eAsylum » Zoloft

I need help.

Administrator — Sun, 15 Mar 2009 15:06:41 +0000

So here is the deal.
I’ve dated the same women ( who has a kid) for a couple months and everything has been going well. The one problem we had was in the bedroom. I was on Zoloft which fucks up your ability to get off. So I spoke to my doctor and we agreed I could probably go off of it. Everything had been going pretty well.

So about a week later she started "the time of the month" and has gone super depressed. SHe lays in bed, doesnt want to do anything and isnt communicating as much as I would like. I figured it would end but its now been 7 days and its beginning to bum me out and make me depressed. So I am half tempted to call the DR and go back on zoloft because I would really like to feel good again. At the same time I feel like I could be fine if I dumped the gf.

I do like her. I just want her to be happy. I think that if I dumped her I would be happier than I am right now. I dont really want to do that because I am sure she is going through more than she is telling me.

Regardless I feel worse than if I had been dumped and dont know what to do

Then what the fuck are you waiting for? Be a man, if she’s holding a lot of info from you, why should you care? If she would only tell you when you threaten to break up with her, theres a big trust issue you need to deal with.

Dump her. You already know you’d be happier. Just do it.
Maybe you guys are spending too much time with each other. Take a break
well she hasnt talked to me properly in 3 days. She wouldnt answer any of my 2 phone calls yesterday.

I sent her a text message this morning (because thats the only fucking thing she knows) and said "Whats going on, are you ok?"

I got "I dont have time to deal with this right now" and basically Im done.. As much as I like her. I think shes got issues bigger than I want to get involved with

Ok, so you were on Zoloft, it was causing sexual dysfunction, so you talked with your physician and discontinued treatment. Outside the bedroom everything is was going well.

So about a week later she started "the time of the month" and has gone super depressed. SHe lays in bed, doesnt want to do anything and isnt communicating as much as I would like.

So she’s menstruating and experiencing depression as a result, is this correct?

I figured it would end but its now been 7 days and its beginning to bum me out and make me depressed.

So because your girlfriend is unavailable, you’re feeling depressed as a result? You don’t have other people in your life, or other activities to take part in while she’s going through this period (literally)?

So I am half tempted to call the DR and go back on zoloft because I would really like to feel good again.

Are you depressed because you’re suffering depression or are you depressed because your girlfriend is dealing with her monthly cycle?

At the same time I feel like I could be fine if I dumped the gf.

Let me get this straight. You’re telling me that you would be fine, and could go without medication, if you exit this relationship? Are you also saying that your girlfriends biological health issue is causing severe strain between you two, or only you?

I do like her.

Just not when she’s struggling with her health, is that correct?

I just want her to be happy.

People aren’t always happy, they suffer health problems, traumatic events, sadness, grief, and sometimes PMS and other associated female related problems. You do understand this, yes? Or is it that you simply can’t accept it?

Is there fighting going on between you two during this depressed period of hers? What is the relationship — simply on pause?

I think that if I dumped her I would be happier than I am right now. I dont really want to do that because I am sure she is going through more than she is telling me.

What do you suspect she’s going through, and what exactly about how she’s behaving is causing depression in you? What do you think it is? I need to have the full truth and the whole story to be of any help here.

Regardless I feel worse than if I had been dumped and dont know what to do

What do you mean? It really sounds like you want out of this relationship for more than the reasons given. What is going on here?

well she hasnt talked to me properly in 3 days. She wouldnt answer any of my 2 phone calls yesterday.

I sent her a text message this morning (because thats the only fucking thing she knows) and said "Whats going on, are you ok?"

I got "I dont have time to deal with this right now" and basically Im done.. As much as I like her. I think shes got issues bigger than I want to get involved with

It sounds like you just flat out don’t want to be in this relationship because she’s dealing with something that came up recently. Have you considered telling her something like this:

You: Listen, I know you’re going through something right now, and I understand that, however you’re not communicating with me, and that’s not acceptable for me. As a result I no longer want to date you. I hope you recover, and it’s very unfortunate that you were unable to be open with me and to communicate with me.
Her: I was open. blah blah
You: I don’t feel like you were, and what I feel is enough for me to make my decision.
Her: Fine, blah blah blah
You: Take care.

Obviously this example is oversimplified, and assumes she’ll lash out. However she may not. I just think it’s important for you to also communicate honestly and completely. This way you can walk away and have better relationships. It’s good practice so you’re clear about your needs and what you want.

If this works out, fine, if it doesn’t — you were clear and honest, and that’s a strong benefit to your character.

Let me know what you end up doing or saying.

It sounds like you just flat out don’t want to be in this relationship because she’s dealing with something that came up recently. Have you considered telling her something like this:

If this works out, fine, if it doesn’t — you were clear and honest, and that’s a strong benefit to your character.

Let me know what you end up doing or saying.

I spoke to my massage therapist today and we came to the conclusion that she has someting going on and the best thing I can do is support her. So I decided I’m going to send her flowers saying very little in the card and if she comes around. great. If not. its over. She isnt even answering when I call anymore

Sounds reasonable to me.
I am on depression medicine that can cause sexual disfunction.
My doctor has always told me that it was alright to take a vacation from that med.
He said that if I wanted to be in tip top shape then schedule it like 48 hours in advance. Stop taking 2 days before.

It works.

The trick is to not go more then 3 days without taking it.

Naturally it is the sort of thing you should talk to your doctor about.
Another option is Wellbutrin. It does not cause sexual side effects if I’m not mistaken, increases energy, decreases depression and attention deficit issues as well as improves memory and cognitive function. You can look it up.

Zoloft works for some people, but I’ve generally heard mostly negative things.

I was on Zoloft which fucks up your ability to get off.

i was on that in 5th grade, no wonder i didn’t notice the difference.

i think my brother takes that.
oh yeah and all depression medicine is bullshit just lettin’ you know ok bye.
From this and the other thread you made about her in the Vag it sounds like your relationship is beyond over. Break up, get back on Zoloft, or do whatever you have to to make YOURSELF happy.

Clearly you have no idea how effective medications such as Zoloft are. Apparently you think you are better informed than people who have spent their lives studying medicine and the human brain. So either you’re just plain ignorant or you have the biggest superiority complex I’ve ever seen.

I take Zoloft, but I still get hard and all that good stuff. I didn’t even know it caused sexual problems. But yeah, give her some time and if that doesn’t work, break it off so at least you can be happy.

You can get hard with no problems. The hard part is getting off during sex. I never have and it BLOWS

You arent providing much help if you have no clue what she is going through.

I sent her a msg today.. We are done. Not because I want to be but because she wants it to be that way.
I guess ill say what I have in my mind.
I cannot blame you for having what you do on your plate. Thats something I cannot control. I have been pretty upset at what has happened lately. I obviously liked you more than I ever imagined I would, especially as quickly as things happened.
I am however upset that you havent told me what I did wrong or whats going on with you. I though we were close enough to have that kind of conversation but apparently I was wrong. I do miss you and would like things to be "cool" again but obviously there is something I do not know. If your interested in salvaging anything or would like to tell me what I did wrong, I would be all ears. You have my numbers.
Regardless I wish you and [your daughter] all the best for now and the future.

Why the fuck are you giving her the option of contacting you again? Why would you tell her "you have my numbers" and all of that, then say that you don’t want to be with her anymore?

You need to figure your shit out.

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What sort of doc should i see for panic attacks?

Administrator — Wed, 04 Feb 2009 11:23:18 +0000

i have experienced panic attacks since i was in high school, but they’re typically very rare and their cause is easily identifiable (stress at school or whatever), but lately they are getting more frequent and scary. i just experienced probably the worst one ever (my hands are still trembling ) and i think i want to see a professional about it.

my question is, should i see my primary care doctor or a psychiatrist? both would be through my university, and both would probably be someone i haven’t seen before. i just don’t know who usually deals with this sort of thing. thanks!

When I used to get them to the point of black out in college I went to my primary care physician. He actually got me on zoloft. I also started briefly seeing a psych.
The ONLY thing your primary care doc will do is give you drugs. Drugs don’t cure panic attacks, so it seems silly to waste your time and money there.

Go see a psychologist who specializes in NON-medication treatment, hypnotherapy, CBT, etc.
See a PCP first. He/She can then better analyze your need for see a psychiatrist.

The ONLY thing your primary care doc will do is give you drugs. Drugs don’t cure panic attacks, so it seems silly to waste your time and money there.

Go see a psychologist who specializes in NON-medication treatment, hypnotherapy, CBT, etc.

So…the Zoloft my primary physician gave me for my panic attacks were just drugs that didn’t work?

Nor does Xanax, didn’t you know?

For real.
Has anyone tried the "suck it up and walk through the panic" method?

I’m not at all being critical or trying to minimize panic attacks. Thankfully, I’ve never had one and I only know of one person that did and it was the result of some screwed up brain chemistry due to drug use. So I don’t know anything about how panic attacks feel or work or any of that.

And I’ve never heard of anyone saying, I knew I was panicked but I was able to keep going and they went away.

Has anyone tried the "suck it up and walk through the panic" method?

And I’ve never heard of anyone saying, I knew I was panicked but I was able to keep going and they went away.

I used to have one weekly, and they were bad too. There were times where I was very capable of fighting my way out of one…but it was hard. Honestly, taking the meds ended them completely and I haven’t had one since…shit, I can’t even remember it’s been so gloriously long.
Usually there is a psychological component, so generally a psychiatrist to treat the anxiety, as well as a therapist to help uproot any possible cause that you can work through.

Thats correct.

Correct also.

And, are you still on the meds?

Has anyone tried the "suck it up and walk through the panic" method?

And I’ve never heard of anyone saying, I knew I was panicked but I was able to keep going and they went away.

it’s WAY harder than it sounds, and took me years of trusting myself enough to do that.
Panic attatcks are rearely one of those singular issues, usually a symptom identifying a much deeper issue. Definitely see someone about them.
I’ve had them since I was quite young and been left in blackout several times. Because they’re linked to stress I try to regulate my breathing and detatch myself from situations, it rarely averts an attack but keeps me concious.
Alternative to seeing someone you might want to experiment with meditation

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effexor withdrawals

Administrator — Mon, 19 Jan 2009 10:52:32 +0000

Jesus this is murder..

I’m not sure if anyone else has come off this drug but after cutting down from 300mg to 225 to 150 to 75mg, i’ve decided to go cold turkey…

I’ve been feeling sick for the past few days, my stomach has been topsy turvey – i.e no control over bowels..

The "brain flashes" and lethargy as well..

General Malice

ugh i want to kill the doctor that put me on this rat poison

Withdrawl sucks. The only thing I can really say is hang in there. It’ll take some time, but it will be worth it once your symptoms go away/

what the hell are you thinking. you need to step down to 9mg at least, but preferably to 4.5. you’ll feel pretty shitty for the next 2 weeks
Yeah… maybe you did this to yourself by going from 75 to nothing? Effexor is no joke. Taper to 37.5 and then go to that every other day, and then go off.

Otherwise… do you have any business calling a drug rat poison if you just stop taking it when you’re NOT SUPPOSED to just stop taking it?
Yuh i’ve been doing a bit more reasearch there’s been a number of people who have gone cold turkey @ 75mg and the same at 37.5, both groups of people tend to have the same length of widthdrawal and the same symptoms.

Also Im not the only one that feels this way about effexor, the side effects while on the drug became just too much for what they were supposed to be treating
you need to taper off that stuff CAREFULLY.. it’s a real strong drug.
that’s why I’m scared shitless to go off this. Right now I’m seeking out a counsler to deal with my SAD instead of just relying on this drug which really ain’t doing me much good. I’ve been stuck at 75 mg in fear of stepping down.
i used to take effexor. when i stopped, i had really bad dizzy spells….takes about a week or so for all of the withdrawls to go away
Day 6 of quitting and yesterday I halved a 75mg capsule to cope with the brain flashes which were getting a bit unbearable…

Side effects have been killing me.. Been avoiding going outside cause it just increases the dizzyness…

One good thing tho i’m not sure if anyone else sufferef from this but while on 225mg of effexor I suffered bad constipation of 5-7 days at a time.. since coming off my stomach has been like clockwork every morning

It’s not the doctor, it’s the fact that you went cold turkey due to impatience and other factors instead of gradually moving down at a slower rate, and then continuing to gradually decrease the dose even once you reached 75 mgs.

I’m sure you have your reasons for doing it this way, but you now know you have to weigh the consequences of the medications side effects at normal doses in contrast to the withdrawl you may experience while trying to end the use of that medication.

I hope you feel better soon, just be far more careful, and use credible information before doctoring your own therapies with medications like this.

Jesus this is murder..

I’m not sure if anyone else has come off this drug but after cutting down from 300mg to 225 to 150 to 75mg, i’ve decided to go cold turkey…

I’ve been feeling sick for the past few days, my stomach has been topsy turvey – i.e no control over bowels..

The "brain flashes" and lethargy as well..

General Malice

ugh i want to kill the doctor that put me on this rat poison

theroadback.org

Also, order a bottle of moodmax from herbolove.com.

It helps a LOT with effexor side effects.
I hated effexor. I swapped to Zoloft and then went off that way. It was hell
Agree with metallicBlue. I was on similar doses of effexor for just under two years and tried to go cold turkey once (from full dosage no less). That was a terrible decision, and I passed out during a wrestling practice, along with similar symptoms. But once I went down gradually, the side effects were minimal over the 7 or 8 weeks…

Good luck and please consult your doc. You’ll be fine
At least my advice is consistently, that was 3 years ago.

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lexapro and drinking

Administrator — Fri, 24 Oct 2008 08:13:02 +0000

well my doctor said he wants to keep me on lexapro for another six mouths…..i told him my 21st birthday is in a mouth and I wanted to drink…He said there is no problem if I want to down a six pack or even drink a pint if i could….he said just do it every once and awhile and dont make a habit out of it…I got the persciption filled and it said dont take with alcohol….. weird…..

anyone ever mixed the two….any difference?…next day feeling? let me know guys
mixing alcohol with any medication is going to intensify the alcohol’s effects.

If you’re taking Lexapro as an anti-depressant, it can also magnify your depression.

I know someone who is going through some drinking issues while on Zoloft at the moment. After drinking a bit one night she had a black out, she was concious and walked home with her friends fine, but she doesn’t remember the night whatsoever.

If you do it, just be aware of the signals your body is sending you, and maybe drink a little less than you planned on. Be careful, make sure you are with someone that can take care of you if you get to that point, but have fun!
You’re going to have one hell of a hangover and you’re going to get fucked up real quick. Have fun and don’t get alcohol poisoning
I’ve been completely shitfaced numerous times on Zoloft and Effexor and I didn’t notice any difference in my intoxication or tolerance.

It’s going to depend on the person. My best friend was on Lexapro for a while and became the greatest lightweight of our time lol.
When I first was put on antidepressants I kept on drinking. I went from having terrible hangovers before taking meds to having absolutely no hangovers after I started taking the medication. Weird but good side effect, I guess.

You can’t get someone to get you beer tonight so you can test it out? Just have like one or two and see how you feel.
When I was on lexapro I still drank all I wanted and never noticed any difference.

yea, thats my plan tonight….

thats good to know…drugs really do effect everyone diffrently
well ive had 4 beers and smoked some weed…and I feel great………….and tired……..oh yea and hungry
Awful, you really should consult your physician. I wouldn’t recommend taking liberal advice off the internet when it comes to your health on this particular issue.

Just because someone doesn’t have symptoms after drinking on medicine doesn’t mean they aren’t doing liver or kidney damage. Your body is already processing the medication through a specific pathway, and if alcohol effects become intensified, it means your body can’t remove it as quickly, thus putting a lot more pressure on your organs. Liver damage often has no symptoms early on or when minor damage is done, but do it over, and over and not be aware you’re hurting yourself, would end unfortunately — you get the point.

I wouldn’t be unwise about this.

Awful, you really should consult your physician. I wouldn’t recommend taking liberal advice off the internet when it comes to your health on this particular issue.

I wouldn’t be unwise about this.

uhh. my doctor said it was okay……did you get that part

Then why are you asking us all if it’s ok?

lol

wat?
i black THE FUCK out when i’m drinking.

ps, on 20mg

Your doctor is incompetent suggesting drinking a 6 pack, or a pint with alcohol in them but go ahead, do it your way. While Lexapro and Alcohol don’t directly interact as drug upon drug, they do interact on the liver and kidneys.

Here is another reason not to drink. You were prescribed the medication because it’s an anti-depressant. Alcohol is a depressant. Anyone prescribed an anti-depressant should not be consuming alcohol or pot otherwise it of course can twart the use of the drug.

If you drink rarely, it will not be serious, such as having a small glass of red wine at dinner, or a beer here and there. The liver can handle a certain amount of abuse.
I’m on 20mg and notice no difference. Just get drunk a little quicker.

how many times do you drink, in say a mouth

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Is anyone else taking LAMICTAL?

Administrator — Fri, 26 Sep 2008 12:07:58 +0000

Ive been on it for about 2 weeks now, 50mg twice a day. If you are on it or were on it how did it work out for you and what dosage were you on?
i took 50mg a day…for what? the doc diagnosed me as mild bipolar….didnt even do anything turns out i had a crazy ex that made me insane for a bit but not bipolar… when i broke up with her stopped taking those..and i was fine…
My roommate is. She’s on 100 mils for schizophrenia/as an anti-depressant treatment. It seems to be working out for her really well, any specific questions you want me to ask her?

I don’t know a damn thing about that medicine, but here’s something to think about: my father was diagnosed with clinical depression years ago, and he tried various medications before settling on…fuck, what was it? Zoloft? Hell, I don’t remember. Anyway, whatever it was, it affected his norepinephrine levels as well as his seretonin levels, and he was so juiced that he would talk in his sleep every night. So he cut back the dose against doctor’s orders. Now he takes a quarter of a tablet twice a week, instead of two tablets every day. The doctor insisted that it couldn’t possibly be therapeutic at that low of a dose, but my dad and I and everyone else could always tell when he was taking that quarter of a tablet and when he wasn’t, so the doctor finally conceded the point.

The doctor doesn’t really know what the right dose is for you. You have to figure that out for yourself, because only you know when you’re heading downhill and you need to take it again. If one pill a day makes you feel jittery or overly excitable, get a pill cutter and cut them in half. Play with it, carefully, until you find the right amount to get you to where you’re stable. You don’t have to be happy all the damn time, just stable. And if cutting the dose causes problems, go back up again.
lamictal is a very strong medicine – it’s used to prevent seizures also

my son has epilepsy and his medicine controls his seizures with virtually no side effects or contraindications – and his is strong stuff

lamictal is one that they try when the lesser ones don’t work and it can have a lot of side effects (plus it’s really expensive, right?) all worth it if you’re seizing all the time though

these people are taking it for a different reason but if you check out the forums at epilepsy.com (lousy UI, but the info is there) you’ll find a lot of people who use this medication

good luck
Yeah, for a while. Got a slight rash at the start which went away. Your Doc should have told you about the rash, takes a little while to kill but it gets there soon enough.

I can’t remember exactly how much I was on but I was also on Depakote so there needed to be a dose adjustment. Something to do with screwing with the half life I think.

so 200mg on Depakote = 400mg Normal.

I maxed out at 200mg.

Didn’t get a damn thing from it.

I kinda like this site for info on drugs, good starting point.

lets see..ive now been taking
it for nearly 1 year. It has certainly made my life alot more bareable!
I got it in December, went up to a dose of 150mg, which was far too high for me so I stopped taking it. I just recently restarted it and am taking 25mg, which seems to help my mood swings enough.
Even 100mg made me feel numb, though, but I don’t know how it would effect others.
I take 150mg a day along with an snri. I’m bipolar and the lamictal makes things much bearable despite being kinda numb. I was on depakote before and it had horrible side effects and required blood tests.
I just started taking it (today’s day 3 for me) so I’m still on the build up phase just taking 25mg a day. In 2 weeks I’ll be on 50mg a day and then 2 weeks after that 100mg a day. Then they’ll begin to see what dosage is right for me.

I’m taking it strictly for bi-polarism btw. I’m new to this as well and definitely haven’t been taking it long enough to notice it yet. I hope for the best.

It has a very good success rate and low side effects, so it is my doctor’s favorite mood stabilizer, she said, because of this.

I kinda like this site for info on drugs, good starting point.

and the information on that website is wrong. I’ve never been on any medication for my bi-polar disorder and am starting out with lamictal.

another misleading ‘informative’ drug site…

and the information on that website is wrong. I’ve never been on any medication for my bi-polar disorder and am starting out with lamictal.

another misleading ‘informative’ drug site…

Yep everything that site says is the total opposite of my experience.

Can you ask her how long it took until she reached stability. Or if she has AIM and can talk that would be cool.

AIM – PaulieWalnuts447

Tried to send you a PM, your box is full.

Yeah it makes me kind of numb too, I want to cry but cant. I guess thats better than freaking.

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My problems with a girl.

Administrator — Wed, 17 Sep 2008 12:15:04 +0000

Warning – This is a very long post with probably poor grammar and most of it is just me getting some stuff off my chest. There are cliffs but for more insight I suggest you read the whole post.

So I met this girl the beginning of this semester. I wasn’t dating anyone at the time and i though she was funny and cute so i turned all my efforts to trying to start a relationship with her. At first we just talked on aim every night before going to sleep but as time went on we started talking on aim all the time.

One weekend I became very sick with the flu and I had to be brought to the hospital in an ambulance. I didn’t have a way to get back to campus and with her being one of the few people I know on campus with a car I called her and asked her to pick me up. Later that night after I got back to my room I talked to her on aim and thanked her once again then asked her if she would like to join me for dinner as my way of saying thank you. This was just my way of trying to get closer to her but she said that it wasn’t necessary and that she did it out of the kindness of her heart. I said okay but then i asked her if she would let me treat her to dinner because I enjoy her company. She agreed to this but i could sense she was hesitant.

later that week i reminded her about our "date" and she seemed like she forgot then she said that it would have to be really early because her boyfriend was coming to visit her that weekend. I said okay but i really felt like canceling because she never mentioned the fact that she had a boyfriend. But I hate cancelling on people so i just went through with it anyway.

So that friday i took her out and we had a great time at dinner with a lot of jokes and after dinner she told me that she was having a little party with a couple of people in her room that night so i should stop by. Since I didn’t have much to do that night I told her i would stop by. I stopped by and there was a large group of people in her room. Me being a relatively shy person decided to force myself to get to know some new people that night. Well for the most part everyone seemed to be pretty cool. The girl i took out to dinner, kate was around drunk out of her mind (she’s a 3 beer queer) and she kept telling me to get ready cause I had to play beer pong with her. After our game of beer pong she was quite wasted and I was bored so i told her I was leaving. She gave me a hug goodbye and we parted ways.

The next day i went and got my first tattoo in the center of my chest. The tattoo artist warned me that if i got the tattoo there I would probably never get another one because it hurts like a bitch there. Thinking that I was more than man enough to handle it I told them to put it there. The moment the needle touched my breast plate I felt like crawling up in a ball and crying. But I had a female tattoo artist and I don’t like showing pain in front of women so i just took it. After that was done all I wanted to do was to drink until pain was a distant memory. Up until that point I hadn’t drank for about 2 months which is when i started taking zoloft for depression. Knowing that kate was having another little get together in her room again that night i gave her a call and ended up going over there. When i got there everyone was just sitting around talking nobody really drinking. So i just sat down and quietly drank about 3 beers in 3 minutes. There was a girl there who was bitching about nobody drinking when it was her birthday so a guy in the room offered to drink some rum with her in his room. I asked if i could have some too and he said sure and we all headed into his room.

I don’t remember much from that night but I was told that i took 20 shots and i woke up around 4 30 that morning sitting shirtless in the dude that i met that night’s room. I had puke all over my pants and the guy was laying on the floor sleeping in his own puke. Kate told me that after our 20 shots both me and him went to her room and he passed out on her roommate bed. Apparently I was sitting in a green chair of hers and at one point I just started puking everywhere. So kate and her boyfriend brought both me and this guy back into his room and left us in there. I had to go back there the next day to get my hoody and i went to kate and apologized for what i had done. she said it was fine but i could tell she was pissed.

After a while she got over it and then after asking her many times and her saying "yes", then changing her mind, she started going to this boxing class with me on campus. I assumed I would be doing the class with her even though i had been partners with a male friend of mine. But when she got to the class she had brought a friend of her own whom she didn’t tell me she was going to bring. I accepted this as her way of trying to have somewhat of a buffer zone if things got uncomfortable. Even though we weren’t in the same group we still joked around a lot and had a good time with each other.

As time went on I grew use to going to this boxing class with her. But as spring break neared I noticed that she didn’t seem as happy as she normally did. I started asking her what was wrong and eventually she opened up that she was going through a difficult time because her parents were getting a divorce. This became one of the rare instances where i can actually say i was there to support someone through a time of need. The day before classes were to end I gave her a huge at the end of our english class and told her to call me anytime she felt overwhelmed. To my surprise she actually did call me. In fact she called me everyday during break and she said many times that talking to me made her feel better.

When break was over we had arranged to hang out and watch a movie together that sunday night. Well that night she came over and we kinda watched raging bull but most of the time we just talked and joked around. When she left I gave her a big hug and she told me again that she really likes my company. The next day a pair of slippers i had ordered for her came in the mail and after our boxing class i brought her up to my room and gave her cow slippers (she lives on a cow farm and she loves cows….in fact she got a cow tattoo during spring break). During break I promised that i had a gift for her that would make her giddy. She was hesitant to admit it would make her giddy but after giving them to her she genuinely seemed giddy.

That friday since both of use finished classes around 2 I called her and asked her if she wanted to hang out. She said sure so i went over to her room and we watched the little mermaid together since she didn’t get a chance to see it growing up. During the movie we joked around a lot but as our talking started to die down i put my hand on her thigh. This soon progressed into me rubbing her thighs then eventually to me holding her as we watched the movie. When her roommate unexpectedly walked in she jumped up and pretended as if I was nowhere near her while we watched the movie. I guess she doesn’t want her roommate to get the wrong idea about our friendship since her roommate knows she has a boyfriend but still her reaction to her roommate walking in kinda hurt me.

Later that night i got a text from her asking if i knew anyone that could get beer for her roommate. I told her no and as somewhat of a call for attention i told her that i felt like shit. she asked me why and i told her that i felt like i was having feeling for her that i don’t think she had for me in return. She responded telling me that i shouldn’t feel any type of way that would cause me to think that I can’t be friends with her and that she wanted us to stay friends. I accepted this but i still kinda felt shitty.

The next day i didn’t really have much to do that night and i was lonely so i asked a friend of kate’s, beth, if she would mind joining me for dinner. she said sure and we went out to eat. We had a good time with me joking around a lot and her laughing a lot. After dropping her back off I went back to my room and smoked weed. Then I took a pill that my doctor told me would help me go to sleep. It turns out that the pill my doctor gave me was a tranquilizer and i don’t think that weed, the tranquilizer and zoloft are a good combination. I was kinda tripping out and for some reason which i’m not really sure of i called that girl beth at like 12 that night and told her to meet me in her building lobby she she can prove to me that she was a good drive. So i walked over to her building and she let me in but she asked me why i came over when she told me it wasn’t a good time. I don’t remember the explaination i gave her but i was probably just rambling. All we ended up doing was talking in her lobby for like an hour.

Then to my surprise i saw kate coming back from a party. Kate said hi to me and she noticed right away that i was pretty fucked up. SHe was kinda tipsy too but i was in worst shape. She volunteered to help me get back to my room. When she got to my building she told me to sign her in since it was passed 11 and all guest have to be signed in after 11. SO i signed her in and we went up to my room. Once I opened my room she went to my bed and collasped in it. I hopped in there with her and we started talking. I asked her how her day was and she told me it was pretty shitty. I offered her the best advice I had and then we started to cuddle. After a while i make a move by trying to kiss her but she stopped me immediately and told me that she couldn’t do that because she has a boyfriend. So i told her that she should break up with him. She said it wasn’t that easy. I told her that was okay and that i was glad to know she wasn’t a cheater. So all we did that night was cuddle and talk. The next day after we woke up she got up to leave and she initiated a big hug.

The next day at our boxing class i could tell that there was something bothering her. We normally went to late night dinner after boxing but she told me that she wasn’t hungry that night. I said ok but later that night I asked her on aim what was wrong and she told me that she wasn’t sure and thinks that she just needed space. I told her ok but if she ever needs anyone to speak to that i would be there for her. For the rest of that week (last week) she was very distant to me. By the time the weekend came i asked her if she wanted to hang out but she said she would be painting the whole weekend for one of her classes. I said ok and by the time sunday came i asked her how her weekend was. she told me that all she did was paint but when i logged onto facebook that night i noticed that one of her friends uploaded pictures of her and some of her other friends drinking in her room last weekend. I was kinda hurt by this since she lied to me but I still didn’t think too much of it. Yesterday i texted her and asked her if she wanted to have lunch like we normally do but she said that today was a bad day since her friends were in a pissy mood and she wanted to have lunch with them. I accepted this but while i was at my judo class later that day i got a text from her saying she wouldn’t be going to our boxing classed because she had too much work. By this point i came to the conclusion that she was simply trying to put space between up. So later that night when i logged on aim and saw her on i sent her this:

Me: Hello Kate, I feel it is my duty to inform you that I think it would be in my best interest if we weren’t friends anymore. Whenever I try to contact you I feel like I’m constantly bothering you. I know you’re going through tough times right now, but all I’ve ever wanted to do was help you through them. But I see myself as another problem on a pile of problems you have. Another reason for ending out friendship is that I like you a lot and I thought you liked me too. But I’ve always been off when it comes to judging how much people like me. In fact I was at a point where I thought everyone hated me until I met you. But as I said I’m bad at judging how much people like me. It was nice having you as a friend while it lasted and i sincerely hope you always feel happy
Kate: KillKingKong we are not ending this friendship…. i just dont feel like i have time right now to hang out and do things with you. you are not a problem for me, i just dont have time and i have no patience for anything anymore and i get frustrated. i like talking to you and stuff but i just think you came on too strong and didnt back down and that for some reason made things hard for me. but i disagree with you in that we cant be friends anymore and i will have to kick your ass if you dont work with me here haha
kate: or at least try to
Me: if i were coming on too strong I apologize but you could have just told me that. I would have calmed down. Instead I feel like if i try to make any sort of contact with you it’s only pissing you off, but all I’m trying to do is make you feel happy. But i dunno I don’t leave myself emotionally open to many people and you were one of the few that I have done so with. I can see how I come off as too strong sometimes but I really do like you and I may show that too strongly at times.
Kate: im glad to know that i am someone you can open up to and share your emotions with and i am sorry if i seem to be bother by you but i just cant handle everything right now… i just need to be left alone for a while but idont want to end our friendship

After that i logged off aim but she texted me asking me if we were still friends. I told her I guess so but i just really hate feeling like I’m bothering her everytime I try to contact her when I’m only trying to put a smile on her face. She told me that she was sorry but she feels like she’s drowning and that from now on she would contact me first. I said okay but i didn’t really believe her since she’s almost never the one to contact me. Today we had class together. I got there before her then her friend beth got to class and sat next to me. She got there last and sat near beth. I didn’t say much to her besides hello. At the end of class instead of walked back to out dorms together i just got up and left. When i was headed to my next class i saw her on her way back to her dorm and she waved at me so i gave her a half hearted wave. In any other circumstance we would go hug each other and have a little talk. That’s basically where I’m at with her now. The main reason for this post is to just get off my chest but I also want to know if anyone else thinks i should just move on and cut my ties? I feel like I’ve been setting myself up for failure and I would prefer not to be hurt any further. I’ve been punching my wall a lot recently and I think i may have damaged my knuckle since i now feel it floating around. I’m not really sure how to deal with the anger and sadness I’m feel so I’m reaching out for help.

cliffs-i met a girl that i like in class. Ask her out to dinner. She says ok, but then says that it’s going to have to be early since her boyfriend was coming to visit her that night. We have a good time at dinner. Become very close friends. she spends the night with me. I make a move but she says no because she has a boyfriend. So all we do is talk for the rest of the night. Every since then she’s been distant

Right off the bat, she doesn’t like like you, she was hesitant because she’s nice and didn’t want to hurt your feeelings by shutting you down.

20 shots? Gotta love dumb kids and their exaggerations. Nice job by the way of making an ass of yourself. I’m not trying to be mean…but it’s a little ridiculous for you to get that drunk in front of a girl you’re trying to impress; doesn’t matter how long it had been since you drank.

Yep, just more proof she’s not that into you.

You are her friend.

Wow, a cow tattoo? She’ll regret that in a few years….and yeah, buying her gifts isn’t going to make her like you more.

That friday since both of us finished classes around 2 I called her and asked her if she wanted to hang out. She said sure so i went over to her room and we watched the little mermaid together since she didn’t get a chance to see it growing up. During the movie we joked around a lot but as our talking started to die down i put my hand on her thigh. This soon progressed into me rubbing her thighs then eventually to me holding her as we watched the movie. When her roommate unexpectedly walked in she jumped up and pretended as if I was nowhere near her while we watched the movie. I guess she doesn’t want her roommate to get the wrong idea about our friendship since her roommate knows she has a boyfriend but still her reaction to her roommate walking in kinda hurt me.

Well yeah…she has a bf.

SHE DOESN’T WANT TO DATE YOU. How don’t you get this by now?

Still not seeing the point of all this, but I’ll keep reading…

How do you not get this? She doesn’t like you, she doesn’t want to see you. You are smothering her and she wants to lie because she’s obviously too weak to just tell you. She likes you as a friend but she recognizes that’s not what you care about so now she just has to distance you from her at all costs.

So later that night when i logged on aim and saw her on i sent her this:

Me: Hello Kate, I feel it is my duty to inform you that I think it would be in my best interest if we weren’t friends anymore. Whenever I try to contact you I feel like I’m constantly bothering you. I know you’re going through tough times right now, but all I’ve ever wanted to do was help you through them. But I see myself as another problem on a pile of problems you have. Another reason for ending out friendship is that I like you a lot and I thought you liked me too. But I’ve always been off when it comes to judging how much people like me. In fact I was at a point where I thought everyone hated me until I met you. But as I said I’m bad at judging how much people like me. It was nice having you as a friend while it lasted and i sincerely hope you always feel happy

Kate: KillKingKong we are not ending this friendship…. i just dont feel like i have time right now to hang out and do things with you. you are not a problem for me, i just dont have time and i have no patience for anything anymore and i get frustrated. i like talking to you and stuff but i just think you came on too strong and didnt back down and that for some reason made things hard for me. but i disagree with you in that we cant be friends anymore and i will have to kick your ass if you dont work with me here haha

kate: or at least try to

Me: if i were coming on too strong I apologize but you could have just told me that. I would have calmed down. Instead I feel like if i try to make any sort of contact with you it’s only pissing you off, but all I’m trying to do is make you feel happy. But i dunno I don’t leave myself emotionally open to many people and you were one of the few that I have done so with. I can see how I come off as too strong sometimes but I really do like you and I may show that too strongly at times.

Kate: im glad to know that i am someone you can open up to and share your emotions with and i am sorry if i seem to be bother by you but i just cant handle everything right now… i just need to be left alone for a while but idont want to end our friendship

She is young and naive. She is praying and hoping that you, as a guy, will be able to JUST be friends with her, but we all know that is not only crazy, but ignorant. You know you want a relationship with her. Telling yourself you just want a friendship is bullshit and deep down you will keep acting the same way towards her, always hoping she’ll dump her bf for you or end up drunk and stupid at your doorstep so she can make bad decisions. You NEED to let her go for a while. You can’t be friends with her and you know it.

Today we had class together. I got there before her then her friend beth got to class and sat next to me. She got there last and sat near beth. I didn’t say much to her besides hello. At the end of class instead of walked back to out dorms together i just got up and left. When i was headed to my next class i saw her on her way back to her dorm and she waved at me so i gave her a half hearted wave. In any other circumstance we would go hug each other and have a little talk. That’s basically where I’m at with her now. The main reason for this post is to just get off my chest but I also want to know if anyone else thinks i should just move on and cut my ties? I feel like I’ve been setting myself up for failure and I would prefer not to be hurt any further. I’ve been punching my wall a lot recently and I think i may have damaged my knuckle since i now feel it floating around. I’m not really sure how to deal with the anger and sadness I’m feel so I’m reaching out for help.

You need to cut your ties with her for a while until you are over being with her. She just wants to as a friends and always has. To be honest you wasted a lot of time on her but hopefully you realize how you went wrong for your future.

Never waste your time on a girl who has a bf. Trying to befriend them and then secretly telling them how you feel will never win you the girl. You will also not win the girl by talking to her nightly on AIM or hugging her. Even if she didn;’t have a bf you went about your relationship completely like a friend. If you like a girl you ask her out, don’t pussyfoot around her. Ask her out. She will tell you yes or no. If she says no you move on. If she says yes then you play it cool and set the date up and go from there.
Thanks, iwishyouwerebeer i kinda needed that brutal honesty at this time. In hindsight I see now that from the beginning I was setting myself up for friendship. Better off cutting my ties as you said instead of beating myself up about it. And I don’t know if i was exaggerating about the 20 shots…as i said i don’t remember much from that night. But I have had a night where i know for sure I’ve had at least 20 shots…and I’ve woken up in the ER because of that night

Yikes…please try to limit what you drink. Drinking past like 5 shots is bad enough, let alone 10+ and waking up in the ER or a pool of your own vomit. It doesn’t make you cool or attractive. I’m sure you’re like 18 or maybe 19 so right now drinking seems to be the thing to do, but you can still have a good time and not become a binge drinker/alcoholic. Not to mention that on top of your Zoloft isn’t a good idea. Why are you on Zoloft anyway? Do you actually fee you have social anxiety? Or did your doctor throw it at you like most do? Do you actually feel it works?

Anywho, enough with the scolding. The point is yes, now you at least know for your future (which you have a lot to live) to not befriend a girl first, especially not one who is already taken. You might want to wander over to the Vaginarium. You will find you are by no means the only guy who has made the mistake of falling for a girl with a bf, but the fact remains that you should never waste time on them.

If they really wanted to be with you they’d make a way to be with you (i.e. dumping their bf).

Thanks once again. And I was pretty much thrown zoloft by my family doctor for depression. During winter break I came home stumbling drink and my parents asked why i would do that to myself. I said i hated my life and didn’t care. Next thing I know I’m at my family doctor and he’s writing me a prescription.
At first I didn’t feel like it was doing anything. Then my doctor here at school moved me up to 100mg and i was feeling pretty good. Then I hit a really low point. And currently I’m at a really low point but I think i just need to get over this girl and I should be fine.
I can’t really top what IWYWB said, but I would watch the drinking when you’re with women. Maybe a few beers to get a buzz to loosen up, but that’s it. Think about what drunk people look like when you’re sober; not cool, right?

If the girls with you are getting completely trashed, then perhaps, but other than that, keep away from the drinks!

All of the depression medicine in the world won’t change the fact that you were being desperate with a girl. It’s something you learned, and more importantly, something you need to unlearn. I would check out some confidence/dating books in addition to some therapy! I’m not raggin’ on you here, I’ve been through it myself.

I can’t really top what IWYWB said, but I would watch the drinking when you’re with women. Maybe a few beers to get a buzz to loosen up, but that’s it. Think about what drunk people look like when you’re sober; not cool, right?

If the girls with you are getting completely trashed, then perhaps, but other than that, keep away from the drinks!

I haven’t been drinking recently. And I don’t really think I need to work on my confidence because as of right now I have no problems approaching girls. However I may not go about starting a relationship in the right manner, so dating books might be helpful. And I’m already in therapy which I tried moving to once every 2 week instead of once of week but I had to push it back to once a week today
Update: Well I tried to follow what you guys suggested and just letting her be but I’m a softie when it comes to girls. So I still went to that boxing class with her today and after the class we went to my room and I just layed all my feeling out. And basically just like you guys said she told me she only views me as a friend. It sucked to have her say that but at the same time it was a relief since I’ve been going through a lot of stress about this, and I just wanted reassurance. I told her that I couldn’t be friends with her anymore but she told me that we’re not ending our friendship because of that. So I guess we’re just gonna try to remain close friends but deep down in side I know that what iwishyouwerebeer said is true and that I’ll always hope she’ll dump her boyfriend and come running to me. However iwishyouwerebeer wasn’t right about the part where she said i would try to take advantage of her when she got drunk…i have some class after all lol
shit like that happens when you have a crush on a girl and invest this much time into her.

shit sucks learn and live iguess

shit like that happens when you have a crush on a girl and invest this much time into her.

shit sucks learn and live iguess

Yeah, falling for girls after knowing them for a while is kinda a flaw of mine. I’m trying to work on it but it just seems that every corner I turn I get labeled as a friend. And when I try to be very direct I get labeled as creepy.
i did it with one girl and didnt follow through with anything so it was my fault BUT im glad i didnt follow through now that ive seen her now.
I pretty much did this same with a few girls before. And am kind of in the same boat right now. But Ive learned from my mistakes and learned not to get so emotionally invested. Especially when I see myself going down the same road that Ive been down too many times before.

Im doing a pretty good job of not making the same mistakes this time. Not "hanging out" all the time, not talking all the time. Bascially just enough to keep interest level there until I make my move.

I mightve waited too long to make the move though. But it was things beyond my control that wouldnt allow me to make the move. If it is too late, oh well. You live and learn. Im still not too emotionally invested so its all good. If things dont work out then I will definetly put as much distance as possible between us. Which is what you should do. You shouldnt keep giving in to staying around her. I know it may feel somewhat good being around her. But just think… shes not thinking about it in that way whatsoever. The more you hang around her the more those feelings are going to want to resurface, and when they do you will just be smashed again.

Yeah, I feel like shit for pursuing her the way I am when she has a boyfriend. Bat I keep justifying it to myself by saying that I haven’t crossed any lines with her sexually so I haven’t done anything wrong. But on the same note I know if the occasion were to arise I probably wouldn’t turn her down even if she was still with her boyfriend

I pretty much did this same with a few girls before. And am kind of in the same boat right now. But Ive learned from my mistakes and learned not to get so emotionally invested. Especially when I see myself going down the same road that Ive been down too many times before.

It pains me to see myself as such a softie when it comes to girls but I don’t feel like I can help my feelings. Lately I’ve been an emotional wreck but not only because of her. I felt like my depression was getting the best of me for a while and then I met her And was happy for a little bit. Strangely enough it was her goofiness that attracted her to me. I kind of get tired of having the feeling that girls think I’m a weirdo when I make a off color joke and she was the first girl I ever met that I didn’t worry about saying some stupid joke around because I knew that she would say something just as awkward as me. While being on cloud 9 since I finally met a girl that I felt like i could be my true self around I guess I let my emotions get the best of me. Then after she withdrew from me after I told her I liked her I felt like it was just another justification of my feelings that everyone I meet no matter how much I think they like me truly hates me. I actually tried to kill myself last weekend but luckily I have a friend that I know has gone through pretty bad depression so I gave her a call after cutting myself. But deep down I know that was just a cry for help basically since I stayed away from those juicy veins that I know would have made me die. Instead I just put a bunch of cuts in my lower forearm.
So kate told me today that she broke up with her boyfriend. So I’m gonna give her space for a week then ask her out or something next weekend.
Why are you investing so much into this girl? To me, if she was in to you, more would have happened on her part, boyfriend or not. Walk away, let it go.

Because I really like her personality. And I have been seeing other girls but she’s the want I want. I don’t believe in people being "meant to be" but I do think it’s rare to find a person who can bring joy to me the way she does. Maybe I’m reading too much into her telling me that she broke up with her boyfriend today. The logic going through my mind right now is that I’m going to try to go for all or nothing right now. So either I’m going to be successful in my attempts on getting her or I’ll just ruin the friendship. And I’m willing to accept failure at this point, but I just hate being in limbo.

And I’m willing to accept failure at this point, but I just hate being in limbo.

Man you aren’t in limbo… you’re in denial. she already told you how she feels.
So I’m still pretty drunk right now but I called her last night while drunk. I’ve been turned down hard and I’ll probably cut her off. But I think I also broke my fist last night from punching a wall. I’m not sure because I’ve punched that wall so much recently but I can’t close my fist without squinting lol. I told her to remind me about what happened so hopefully I’ll leave it be, but FUCK I hate liking someone so much but not having the feelings returned. I just fucking hate being me sometimes. I hate feeling that everyone wishes I were dead. And I fucking hate always wishing I was dead. Fuck I don’t know I’m drunk but want to die all the time.
Honestly stop drinking, if you have strong negative emotions, the alcohol will only amplify it.

Yes it sucks, we have all been there at some point in time, but seriously pick yourself up and move on.

Another thing, eat a lot of protein and hit the gym, it will make you feel better and you won’t have the negative side effects of drugs.

Stop drinking.

Strongly consider seeking therapy
Alcohol is a mood amplifier, not a mood enhancer. I tend to avoid it when things are down.
Dude… you are an obsesser.

You obsess about one girl so much that it SCARES THE LIVING SHIT OUT OF THEM!!!

What you need to realize is that there are a TON of women out there.

Like 3 BILLION OF THEM.

Who gives a shit about this girl.

I mean seriously… she has a cow tattoo?

HOW LAME IS THAT?

SERIOUSLY LAME!

Stop trying to put all your effort into one girl immediately!!!

What you need to do is get over the feeling of rejection.

I’m pretty good with women, not the best, but pretty good.

When I’m on the prowl I get turned down by probably 9 out of 10 of the women I talk to… but look at it this way.

I talk to 40-50 women in a night, that’s 4 or 5 numbers a night that I get, and them maybe one of those 4 or 5 numbers that I get, are girls that I actually want to spend any kind of time with.

When you’re first starting out, it might be 1 in 200 women that give you their number, and want to spend time with you.

Do not take rejection to heart. You will reject people and people will reject you. These are facts of life.
Dude…she doesn’t like you. Please stop investing so much in this girl. Stop talking to her. Even sans-boyfriend she still doesn’t want to date you, get it through your head.

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Don’t know how to feel anymore

Administrator — Tue, 16 Sep 2008 12:39:17 +0000

I’ve been diagnosed with depression and have been taking zoloft for it but I haven’t been feeling like it’s helping much recently. Recently I’ve just been feeling like my emotions are all rushing to me at the same time. I woke up yesterday and somehow I felt like crying, laughing, and punching my wall until my knuckles bled. I never really felt that way before, but all I did was just curl back into bed and skipped my first class. I’ve been having quite a bit of problems with a girl and I will admit that situation is a big part of it, but I’ve been feeling down for a while. However the biggest problem is that I feel like everyone hates me and finds me annoying. I’ve asked many people and have been told each time that I’m not annoying and that the only thing that makes me annoying is me asking people if I’m annoying. I don’t know exactly why I have these feelings but they’ve kept me from keeping friends pretty much my entire life. In high school I was known as the quiet kid basically and didn’t really have any close friends but I had a lot of acquaintances. When I got to college I decided to be more out going. I don’t have problems making conversation or making people laugh but for every potential friendship I have i usually end up losing touch because I’m always overcome with the feeling that I’m bothering people. Perhaps this is a low self esteem problem but I don’t really have a negative view of myself physically and I think I’m pretty funny since I can constantly make people laugh, but for some reason I can’t escape the feeling that I’m bothering everyone. These feelings and my situation with that girl have all kinda piled up on me and I feel like I’m withdrawing from the world like I have had a tendency to do in the past. Before when I would get depressed I would have sudden bust of anger while by myself and the only way I knew how to express that anger was to punch my wall. I haven’t cried in years and really don’t know if I can anymore. One part of me thinks that crying might actually make me feel a little better, but another part of me doesn’t want to cry because at that point my emotions have just got the best of me to the point where i can’t control them so I might end up killing myself. I dunno I just don’t know how to feel anymore.

If you find your medication isn’t helping like it used to, you need to communicate that with your doctor. He will up the dosage, or find other medication to try that might suit you better, or even prescribe another medication to take with the zoloft that will counter it’s side effects. You thinking you are constantly annoying seems to be some type of anxiety. Again, bring this up to your doctor. Medication is prescribed for those who have conditions such as this to where it interferes with your daily, normal life. It will treat you correctly if you stay open with your doctor. It may take multiple medications, but that’s okay. Being medicated and stable is alot better than having these wild emotions and anxiety outbursts, right?

Sometimes I don’t even know if I want to continue taking the medication. 6 months ago I didn’t have to take anything unless it was a sleeping pill for my insomnia. Now I’m taking zoloft, some tranquilizer my doc gave me to help with sleep, and smoking weed almost daily this week since I’ve felt like like a emotional wreck this week. I kinda tried to kill myself last weekend but it was a half assed attempt. I knew putting a whole bunch of cuts in my lower forearm wasn’t going to do much, but i just kept slicing away without the nerve to hit a vein. There is one thing I can say that zoloft has seemed to have helped me with and that’s general anxiety. But I don’t know some days i feel good (not great) and some other days I feel like I should just slit my wrist. The scary part now is that after cutting myself a bunch last weekend I’m now over that fear that cutting myself would hurt too bad so I now know slitting my wrist is a possible course of action. Hell I don’t know sometimes I kinda wish mixing all these fucking pills and weed will just put me out of my misery in my sleep like heath ledger. I hate acting/feeling all emotional but it seems like I hit a wall that I can’t get around right now.

You need to be honest with your doctor and get help. Cutting is a sign of a severe depression problem. If you aren’t honest with them, they can’t help you. Look into a pyschologist as well, they aren’t licensed to prescribe medication and they can work with you through mental therapy. It may take a few before you find the right one, but keep searching, you’ll find one you like.
Get out of your depression hole you’re sinking in, which is probably your room/apt/whatever. Go to a book store, sit down and read some self help books with what you’re facing. They can help immensely, and it gets you in a well lit positive place. Environment is key with depression. The more you sit around in a dark place laying in bed, the worse you’ll become. Go out with friends, see movies, talk a walk. Get out of your room.

I already see a psychologist and this week we talked about me feeling like everyone hates me for some reason. But I don’t feel like I can be completely honest in there since I told her that i drank one night and woke up in a strange room covered in puke. She went and told a alcohol counselor who i was seeing separately (for an alcohol poisoning incident ) and who I told I hadn’t had a drink in 2 months to. And one time I told her I felt like killing myself. She asked me if I had a plan and I told her I always had a plan. Then she suggested me going into a hospital for evaluation but I rejected that idea. Ever since that I haven’t told her about the days I’ve felt like killing myself and I hid the cuts on my arm from her this week.

Yeah I have a tendency to isolate myself in my room when I’m feeling depressed. I also cut my ties with people when I’m depressed. I can’t even count the amount of times where I’ve just laid in my bed with my eyes closed under my covers wide awake just hoping it would all end somehow without me having to do anything. I’m gonna go out tonight with a friend but we’re going to a frat I know I’m going to drink, but I don’t know how much yet. My mood will probably dictate how much I drink, and if my mood if the same as it is now then I’m predicting a forgotten night.

She’s trying to help you. If you aren’t willing to get the help you need and take her behavior and threatening there’s nothing she can do.

Zoloft + Alcohol = blackouts and forgetting nights. It’s very common.

She’s trying to help you. If you aren’t willing to get the help you need and take her behavior and threatening there’s nothing she can do.

Zoloft + Alcohol = blackouts and forgetting nights. It’s very common.

zoloft + atarax + weed + alcohol = tonight
I don’t know what’s going to happen or what I’m going to do. I just want to live carelessly tonight.

Enjoy yourself

If you’re thinking about suicide you aren’t enjoying yourself.
I guess I fucking lose then. Cause I’m fucked up, but I still want to die so bad. Luckily my cousin was here this weekend so i didn’t do anything. But thinking about it now I kinda know that if I were by myself I would have probably ended it tonight. As bas as that sounds I don’t even feel like I would have any regrets about it. Every fucking day I wish I would just break down then feel better 2 0 minutes later. But I can’t fucking cry. From growing up in my family I learned that I have to hide my emotions unless under the influence. But lately I feel like my emotions are too fucking much for me to handle. I hate feeling that way and lately I just hate fucking feeling anything. I keep repeating this same song in my fucking head "I swear to god I wanna slit my wrist and end this bullshit, throw the magnum to my head, threaten to pull shit, then squeeze, until the bed’s completely red, glad I’m dead a worthless fucking buddaha head"

/thread

And don’t bitch that it costs money. Of couse it costs a lot of money, but if you save up over time it makes the trip that much more worth it. (just got back from my week vacation )

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Taken off zoloft, prescribed lexapro

Administrator — Sat, 06 Sep 2008 02:04:27 +0000

So I was recently taken off of zoloft and prescribed lexapro. I didn’t think zoloft was working because I still constantly felt like shit and have a few attempted suicides recently. It’s been 3 days since I took zoloft last and I’m now taking lexapro. I’m starting to think that zoloft must have been helping me because right now I feel the worst I’ve ever felt in my life and I just keep thinking about depressing things and killing myself. Hopefully this lexapro will kick in soon and actually help me more than zoloft was but I just feel so fucking bad right now that I don’t want to wait.

Switching can indeed be a precarious thing, i don’t know how long you’ve been using Zoloft, but anti-depressants are always to be taken with caution. There’s a whole scala of side-effects and if you take them and still feel bad, then the experience is definitly not so nice. I hope you take good care of yourself, also know that there is no pil for every problem, anti-depressants are symptom suppressors, not problem solvers. I therefore truelly hope you are working together with a theraphist to work on the root of your problems. If you feel like venting you can post your entire story here too.
The source of my depression is my inability to make a close connection with people. I go through phases where I’m very outgoing and make friends but then suddenly I get overcome with the feeling that everyone hates me so I isolate myself. I recently became friends with a girl who was the only person that I never though hated me after talking to her for a while. I recently ruined that friendship and now I’m right back in the same place thinking that everyone hates me which in turn makes me hates me and want to just slit my wrist. I don’t know why I can’t escape this feeling especially since I’ve had many people telling me that the other thing about me that bothers them is me asking them if they think I’m annoying. It seems like a self esteem issue but when I think about myself I see no major flaws. I think I’m funny and know others think so. I don’t really look all that shabby. And I’m semi-smart. But none of this matters because I feel that no matter how "good" of a person I am everyone still hates me.

You are bipolar II. I know, I am and I go through the same thing. Lexapro is > zoloft, I’ve been on both, but you need a mood stabilizer.

after my parent came up to school to talk to my doctor and she found out I’ve been hurting myself she mentioned that i may be bi polar. I don’t know all the in’s and out’s of bi polarism but I’ve never wanted to hurt anyone else or anything. I don’t have sudden burst of rage around people. When I’m interacting with people I always try to be outgoing. It’s when I’m by myself that I get all emotional and what not.
Today I feel like I’m completely spiraling out of control. I can’t focus on my school work at all. I just keep having very bad thoughts over and over and over. If lexapro doesn’t start working soon then I’m just going to give up on taking pills. I was feeling depressed for quite some time before I started taking any anti-depressants but it wasn’t until I started taking them that I started feeling like killing myself.

If you are bipolar antidepressants will make you swing out of control. If you are feeling like this you need to see a doctor, you most likely need a mood stabilizer such as lamictal or depekote to go along with it.

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