my question is, should i see my primary care doctor or a psychiatrist? both would be through my university, and both would probably be someone i haven’t seen before. i just don’t know who usually deals with this sort of thing. thanks!

When I used to get them to the point of black out in college I went to my primary care physician. He actually got me on zoloft. I also started briefly seeing a psych.
The ONLY thing your primary care doc will do is give you drugs. Drugs don’t cure panic attacks, so it seems silly to waste your time and money there.

Go see a psychologist who specializes in NON-medication treatment, hypnotherapy, CBT, etc.
See a PCP first. He/She can then better analyze your need for see a psychiatrist.

So…the Zoloft my primary physician gave me for my panic attacks were just drugs that didn’t work?

Nor does Xanax, didn’t you know?

For real.
Has anyone tried the "suck it up and walk through the panic" method?

I’m not at all being critical or trying to minimize panic attacks. Thankfully, I’ve never had one and I only know of one person that did and it was the result of some screwed up brain chemistry due to drug use. So I don’t know anything about how panic attacks feel or work or any of that.

And I’ve never heard of anyone saying, I knew I was panicked but I was able to keep going and they went away.

I used to have one weekly, and they were bad too. There were times where I was very capable of fighting my way out of one…but it was hard. Honestly, taking the meds ended them completely and I haven’t had one since…shit, I can’t even remember it’s been so gloriously long.
Usually there is a psychological component, so generally a psychiatrist to treat the anxiety, as well as a therapist to help uproot any possible cause that you can work through.

Thats correct.

Correct also.

And, are you still on the meds?

it’s WAY harder than it sounds, and took me years of trusting myself enough to do that.
Panic attatcks are rearely one of those singular issues, usually a symptom identifying a much deeper issue. Definitely see someone about them.
I’ve had them since I was quite young and been left in blackout several times. Because they’re linked to stress I try to regulate my breathing and detatch myself from situations, it rarely averts an attack but keeps me concious.
Alternative to seeing someone you might want to experiment with meditation

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I’m not feeling to good today, actually it’s my stress. I knew I was a stress case, but my MH doctor wrote a lot of things that she never told me about in my disability qualification letter. I wonder if she is hiding anything else from me? She knows that I’ve educated myself off and on in psychology for the last fifteen years. I think because of that she is not talking to me very much, except for how I’m feeling and if I’m taking my meds.

I’m really worried to death and it hurts my stomach when that happens. I know exactly what this stuff means in the letter, but maybe I’m reading to much into it? This is the letter that so wrote.

To Whom It My Concern:

This regarding Mr. ****** (DOB 10/21/67) who is a patient of mine at ****** for Mental Health. He has a diagnosis of Panic Disorder, Manic Depressive Disorder NOS and Attention Deficit Disorder by history. He has a long history anxiety, panic attacks, depressed mood, problems with attention concentration and short term memory. He has problems with poor impulse control, anger and difficulty maintaining interpersonal relationships. His situation is worsened by his chronic homelessness, poor financial situation and lack of occupational identity.

All these issues make it difficult for **** to work in a competitive labor market. They have plagued his his entire adult life and make it difficult for him to find and sustain employment, compelling him to apply for disability.

Man that’s a lot of stuff. What do you guys think about a letter like this?

What do you mean?

If you died, would you want the world calling it that shit?

Ten bucks is the only thing I’ve truely spent on myself for the past 5 years. I got the money from ads on a blog that it no longer.

Yep! 40 minutes left.
need more backround info.

are you really that homelessness have a poor financial situation ?

where are you posting from. etc..
Some libraries have 4 hour internet and others have only one.
damn i should do that, seems easier than working, broseph

I live off of $140 a month general assistance and that is all. With my car insurance, gas and a small fine. I have no money left. This is why I’m desserately appy for disability so I can have some stability in my life.

The process takes three years and is unbelieve the buerocracy that is involved. It’s not like the old days, you have to hire a lawyer and fight it in court.

this should be stickied for all non AV fags
jesus no wornder you only have 226 posts you muyst get bored of ot after like 10 seconds

I coudln’t afford to look for work if I wanted to. Think about it. gas is 3.50 and I only get $140 a month with bills to pay.

I don’t understand the comment, but yes I spend very little time online.
it will take a while but when you get ssi it will be retroactive.

you will get a big ass check to blow on drugs.
Dude, are you shitting us?

Thread about how to use Paypal.
Another thread talks about you possibly getting an STD after a long night of partying?

You are correct, but the drugs you are mistaken.

sell vehicle, ride bus. ???? profit. Then get a job.

That written to make a point that very few got here. I was psychoanalysing some of you.

How do we know you aren’t doing the same thing now?

I sleep in my car, and lets not get off track about the letter and my anxiety attacks and manic drepression etc.
San Jose, California… unemployed with $140 a month. Are you a mexican? Go hop on the back of some trucks…

Be cause I don’t plan on comming back to this forum. I’m going to forget forums altogether and get a basketball for the park.

wat

that sucks. how old are you?
BTW, there is no way in hell that the letter is real. There is a typo "is is"

You’re telling me that your doctor didn’t proof read it first?

yeah, hes bi-polar for sure.
How does that make you any different from the rest of people in California?

Yet you have a post that says you just purchased this?

That shit is like $70, brah.
I have pretty much the exact same diagnosis, yet I still work for a living
So how did you get to this point? What happened that got you from a functional member of society to applying for disability insurance?

You should be posting this in the Asylum forum, not the Main…more sympathetic audience imo.
Main forum –> Asylum

Asylum rules apply from here forward.

aawwww

weak
now that we are in the Asylum..

other than disability, has anyone mentioned a cure or some preventative meds?

like to stabilize you or something?

.

I think she’s accurately explaining in a conscise way what she’s observed during the appointments you’ve had. That is her job, to analyze you, and based on her experience.

Is anything she said untrue? I doesn’t look untrue to me, and in-fact that letter is fantastic in terms of applying for SSI. It’s a great letter for that purpose.

Just ignore him, he’s ignorant.

Absolutely agree, I went through the same thing. I was disabled in 2000, but didn’t receieve approval until 2004. So that’s 4 years I lived barely scrapping by.

Once he can afford healthcare through Medicare, he’ll likely improve substantially. He’ll have access to better counseling services, medications and doctors.
It’s also possible she’s trying to help you out and put a few extra things in there that could or could not be part of your problems. That way you have less problems continuing with SSI.
My question is, are you using this as a "get out of jail free card" or are you getting help to actually overcome all this stuff? I haven’t seen a single "problem" that cannot be cured or managed with medication and therapy. I mean really…. getting disability for panic attacks? I get anxious fairly often, but, I can still make it into work. Work actually helps me, because anxiety is only as powerful as you let it be. The more attention you give it, the worse it is. When I’m on break, if I feel anxious, I’ll go back to work and it’ll get better because my mind isn’t on it.
i suffer from anxiety and bipolar disorder. i would qualify for disability due to my inability to hold jobs because of my anxiety and bipolar disorder combined (going into depressive phases). so what did i do? i went on a new medicine. i seem to be a lot better now. try something new with the money you get from ssi.

With that logic it’s like a person like me telling you there is no such thing as panic attacks because I never in my life have had one.

What now?

There are millions of people who suffer with problems that a medication and counseling can’t help — in-fact medications are the 4th leading cause of death in the U.S. They save a lot of lives, but they take a lot too. And counseling while obviously helpful to millions is also unhelpful to many as well.

His situation isn’t your situation. He applied for disability and wrote about it on OT because it’s obviously more severe than your downregulated, short-sighted, minimized, condescending version of "panic attacks." (JMO)

I’m glad doing something helps you manage your panic problems, but psychiatric problems aren’t something you "think away, or wash away while cleaning a toilet." People can have infections and other diseases causing those attacks as well as other problems which certainly dissolves your quote of "anxiety is only as powerful as you let it be.", so it’s important to not minimize a case and show compassion and remain open minded.

This "We’re all capable/all powerful" thing isn’t truth. Reality is, people get sick with things they often can’t control, just as much as those they get sick with and could have prevented. It’s not my place to decide which is which.
IMO this should be deleted as I think it’s a hoax.

There are multiple typos in the "doctors" letter.
Well maybe they sent him a paper letter and he retyped it?

I dont remember asking you a god damn thing

that sounds very logical. like he was trying to transcibe it

This is the asylum not the main forum, it would be wise to change your attitude immediately.
Hey brother.. appeal this and hire a lawyer.

If you do a bit of research, you’ll find that most lose their first SSI attempts. This is common.

Why do you care?

By the way, sorry if I came off arrogant in my last response to you.

Is he going to read a post that says "Get a job" and then think "Great idea, why didn’t I think of that!" ??

Why ask him a question that you know he can’t answer, since he obviously isn’t "him." We try to offer advice and suggestions, but only the person asking can "fix" their problem. The Asylum is meant to help people fix their own problems or at least point them in a direction that can help lead them to someone more experienced/trained that can offer counsel.

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I honestly don’t know where this comes from, but everytime I see or hear about my girlfriend drinking I have this serious negative reaction where I get really angry/upset, my heartrate goes way up, and my stomach turns in knots. It’s f’ing weird, and it causes strain in our relationship and in my life in general, and I’d love to be able to change it.

Last night was the night her mother wanted to take her out to celebrate graduating from college. I wasn’t invited along because my gf knew how I react when I see her drink, and she didn’t want me to ruin the night I guess. That, in itself, made me feel like crap. Anyway, she went and had a bunch of drinks, and came home a few hours later than she said she would. She never called or anything to let me know she was going to be later, but again, I know it’s because she thought I would get upset that she was drinking more than she said she would (she said she would have 1-2 at max). When she came home I started a big fight, and although it’s resolved now I still feel like crap over the whole thing.

I mean, she was in a safe environment…her mother loves me, and would never let a guy come take her away or something. I’m just not sure why I respond to that particular situation like I do. I can watch friends drink themselves unconscious, and while I find it annoying at a certain point, I never have this type of mental/emotional/physical response. As I’m sure you can guess, I don’t drink at all…not because I’m necessarily against drinking, just because I never feel like doing it.

The strange thing is that it’ll happen if she’s sitting right next to me drinking something or if she’s with someone else and I’m not there. It’s the same response, either way. It also doesn’t matter how many…it happens with the first drink all the way through the last. And she doesn’t drink often – she admitted last night that this was the most she had to drink, ever. The last time she drank was New Year’s Eve, so it’s not like it’s happening all the time.

I just want to change how I react to the situation. I know in my head that I shouldn’t react this way…that it’s not a big deal, everyone does it, she was in a safe place, she’d never cheat on me, etc. It’s just this automatic physical/emotional response that I can’t seem to break.

Any suggestions on how to deal with this situation?

There’s nothing wrong with drinking.

There is something wrong with being an addict however.

If she’s doing it in a safe/controlled environment and doesn’ do it reguarliy, whats the harm?

Perhaps try drinking with her?

That’s the point…I understand all of that, which is why this is so frustrating. It’s not a conscious reaction, it’s totally automatic. I suppose if I’m out with her I could have a drink…that might help a bit. I’m always the one driving, so I always feel like it’s my duty to stay sober. In some ways, I guess, it does make it worse when it’s something she’s doing that I’m not…maybe being that "outsider" makes me react as if it’s worse than it is.
I don’t see anything wrong with drinking, just as long as she does not become an alcoholic.
Did either of your parents drink too much or was someone close to you an alcoholic?
I can sort of empathize with your situation. If my significant other drinks, I get kind of weirded out. Not as dramatic of a reaction, but it still sets off a small flutter of aprehension.

For me, I think it’s mostly because of the fact that I’m jealous that my significant other is having fun without me, and I kind of wonder why she’s drinking in the first place because she doesn’t drink at all.

Another reason, something I don’t personally experience but you might, is that even though you tell yourself "she won’t cheat on me", "she won’t do anything stupid" etc., your subconscious might still be a little paranoid about it as a simple defense mechanism. It may or may not be a trust issue, but doesn’t necessarily have to be. It’s also probable that you’re just subconsciously concerned about her. Alcohol does cloud judgment. Even though she’s in a safe environment, that doesn’t mean you can’t feel healthy concern.

So, I guess it’s up to you to really figure out why you have this reaction to your significant other drinking. Then, and only then, can you tackle the root cause.
I would say it has to do with you being worried about her doing something with another man that she wouldn’t normally do because of the alcohol.

I really believe this when you say "I mean, she was in a safe environment…her mother loves me, and would never let a guy come take her away or something." You didn’t say "Her mother wouldn’t let her drink enough to get alcohol poisoning," or "Her mother wouldn’t let her get behind the wheel." To me, that post shows what is going on in your subconscious mind.

If that’s the case, then you should check out some books on building trust in a relationship. Remember, just because you know in your head that she won’t cheat doesn’t mean your heart knows it too.
I have gone through the same problem. I STILL get a little tightness in my chest whenever I hear a girl I’m dating is wasted or something. I think it has to do with the fact you’re afraid something bad is going to happen since you aren’t around. It’s a justified cause, as let’s face it, alcohol severely lessens your ability for good judgment, but you can’t start assuming and accusing unless the signs are obvious.

That’s the battle you’ll find yourself in with a g/f who drinks sometimes when you aren’t there. The line between feeling that quick tightness automatic response, and assuming something bad happened and accusing is very thin.

This is what I first thought. This kind of reaction doesn’t come out of nowhere. Something must have given you such a negative view of alcohol that you don’t drink and have panic attacks when you girlfriend does.

This was my second thought. Paranoia won’t get you anywhere. Unless she’s given you a reason not to trust her (then why are you with her anyway) just let her do her own thing. Life is much better when you’re not paranoid all the time.

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First of all, I’m really stressed from work. I am a software engineer at a startup company at which I started in January, this is my first job since coming out of university. For some reason, I’m the only person remotely qualified in some aspects. For some reason, I’ve also been eager to take up as much responsibility as possible which means that 4 months later, I end up with some important responsibilities for which I am only remotely qualified and I keep hitting walls and encountering problems.

Second of all, I got dumped by my girlfriend about 2 weeks ago. She basically thinks that I’m really fun to hang out with but thinks it was a mistake to go further. That did wonders for my self-esteem.

Third of all, I just started studying for my masters part-time right tonight. It’s a ton of work, and I don’t know if I can make it. Notwithstanding that it’s probably the worst way to relax before going to bed.

Fourth of all, I’ve restarted going to the gym. And for some reason, going to the gym makes it harder for me to sleep. I go in the morning, and for some reason it makes me way more awake the entire day, up to and including all the following night.

Fifth of all, I think there’s now fleas in my apartment, I keep getting bitten, and I’m now staying awake in anticipation of being bitten. Stupid nasty neighbors. Gotta find a new place.

And worst of all, I’m isolated and emotionally starved. My only real friend was my girlfriend and I feel betrayed by the way she left me. My other friends are only draining me.

and nope, haven’t had caffeine in a long while. I’m way too stressed naturally already.

In the past, I’ve experienced numerous depressions, and I now recognize that being unable to sleep is the first step to getting much worst and plunging into a depression. I need to alleviate the stress and start sleeping again.

Did I mention that I’m a total underdog story? My dad was a drunk and violent man who left us when I was around 10. We barely lived on welfare and were indoctrinated by this awful sect that my mom got from her father that kept us isolated. I was always beaten in school and nearly conceded to accepting my faith as a member of this sect and quitting school. However, my older sister had a rebellious streak and decided that me and her would leave together and go to College. It seems that I’ve spent the last few years of my life trying to undo the damage that I sustained as a child, but I always seem to fall back. I’ve now got a job as a software engineer, make 50,000 dollars a year, found a job for my sister but I still need to deal with all my other problems and I don’t know where to start. I seriously don’t know what to do.

I need guidance.
Try seeking advice from a psychologist / psychiatrist. There may be some meds that will help you out with your problems (especially the sleeping). I recently had a girl leave me as well in a very harsh manner might I add and the worst thing was she was probably the one I cared for the most – just but remember it all passes eventually.

I didn’t believe in medications about 5-6 years ago when I really could have used them so I never took the plunge until recently. I pretty much self diagnosed myself to have ADD and general anxiety disorder. Once I started the meds they made such a difference in my life in such a short period. I can function just like I used to when I could be considered ‘normal’. No more anxiety and opting to stay away from social gatherings in fear of panic attacks, ect. Thoughts that used to loom in the back of my mind receded and I have a lot more confidence. Once you gain more confidence i’m sure you’ll start going out more and forming new relationships.

While your case may be a little different, seriously just attempt to seek some professional advice / help.

As for the problem at work, just let your boss or supervisor know how you feel on the subject. I know its always nice to try and make good impressions but try not to overburden yourself. Don’t be scared to bring up your feelings to the higher ups and unless they are total pricks they should be very understanding and accommodate your needs.

Remember always look forward, not behind. Don’t dwell on the past – its long and gone. Each new day brings opportunities to better your life and the lives of those around you.

All the best to you.

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I don’t understand why they prescribe SSRIs with worse side effects whereas the Xanax just carries possible dependency issues w/ taking it (also nasty withdrawals symptoms, ect). I’m not really clinically depressed, just depressed because the anxiety takes hold of me and I am not able to function at my best due to it.

Can’t these guys just give me the shit that I know WORKS FOR ME and stop throwing worse shit my way?

/rant

not really addicting though you do get withdrawal symptoms after prolonged use when taken off it. it works so well if you truly suffer from anxiety you will develop a dependency because its just that damn good.

no i don’t believe so. its classified as Anxiolytic; Sedative; Benzodiazepines.

I have friends that are very much in this class.

Never ever will I get started on that shit.

ya i understand. lots of people have been taking it for years with no more over 2mg max a day. i could definitely live off that. these SSRIs scare me though. they seem to carry more side effects over any benzo i’ve seen. benzo’s only seem to carry dependence/withdrawal symptoms whereas SSRIs have withdrawal + other more severe side effects.

This is why you aren’t a doctor. Lexapro is VERY effective for anxiety, and you won’t abuse it like xanax. I took lexapro and it took care of my anxiety. It will take some time to work, it’s not going to make you instantly drunk.

ya i’m gonna give it a shot. he said hell still give me xanax since i do get slight headaches / dizziness when i don’t take it.

hopefully it works.

You’re going to have to give it a month at least, maybe two, but one day you’ll realize that you’re doing something you never would have been able to do before.

are you still on it?

So you are taking xanax and lexapro? God help you if you decide to get off of those two in combination.

Also doesn’t lexapro come with strong tendancies of suicide the first few weeks/month?

More misinformation. When I got off lexapro the doc told me I could quit cold turkey, but to be safe, cut the pill in half for three days. And I was very suicidal at the time and it made me much better.

I had to switch to something that would work better with my mood stabilizer (I’m bipolar.) But for general depression and anxiety it was fantastic. No side effects and weight neutral.

Ya I understand its going to take some time to reach its full potential.

However, since I started taking Xanax my general anxiety disorder has been totally stomped to the ground. And it didn’t take weeks to work – the effects work in < 30m and I can continue about my day free of worry and be totally efficient.

Quick questions for you if you don’t mind. After you were taken off the Lexapro was your anxiety still present? Is the new medication you are on now working just as well?
I take Lexapro and have GAD, and it’s worked wonders for me. I hardly ever worry about random BS anymore.

Ahh. I thought they didn’t give out SSRI’s to young people becasue of significantly increased thoughts of suicide for an initial period.

Can you drink while on SSRI’s? Does it tax your liver too much or is it just because it affects the seratonin levels, thus the effectiveness of the drug.

You’ll find drinking + SSRI’s = blackouts and/or frequent memory loss.

Most people who drink when on SSRI’s will be active and function okay, but will wake up with no memory of what happened the night before.

Holy fuck that’s terrible. Do you get drunk faster? I’m just curious becuase I had the option of taking Effexor for something unrelated to anxiety or depression and I passed, taking the non drug route and I’m starting to think I made the right choice (Beer crew, homebrew crew, whiskey crew). Although it’s an SNRI it acts in a similar way and has similar side effects.

Didn’t they also find that Prozac’s and similar anti depression drugs benefits were largely a placebo? I believe I read it a few months ago.
while xanax is addictive SSRIs can be just as bad if not worse. The side effects of SSRIs make them totally not worth it for me. No doctor will prescribe me xanax though so I just have to deal with my anxiety/depression like everyone else.

lemme rephrase…..

are you still taking anything now for your anxiety?
Just to explain what I took in the place of the SSRI’s and SNRI’s and the things like Prozac and the like, I went on 5-HTP and Rhodiola. I took 50mg of 5-HTP in the evening and at night and Rhodiola in the morning.

I know that the above two, or maybe tryptophan in the place of 5-HTP, is just as effective, or moreso than most antidepressants and anti anxiety meds. Without the harsh side effects and at much less cost (Most health plans will cover them and all will if you have a doctors permission).

If you want a viable alternative please look into it. I know a few people that have weened themselves off of things like Paxil, etc… with ease after taking this and thier sypmtoms actually improved greatly vs. the drugs. They said it was like taking MDMA the whole day, but with full functioning.

Bonus is that there is little to no alcohol troubles.

I don’t know if you get ‘drunk faster’, as most people drink the same and act the same. They just wake up with no memory of the night. It’s not that they get so drunk they have a blackout and fall on the floor, they just do as they do normally, but something with the medication makes them forget what took place hours before they went to sleep. It affects everyone differently.

Anti-depressants will definitely have a placebo effect on people who are really wanting to get better. Those who don’t believe the pill will help whatsoever will either complain about being ‘numbed’ out to where they have no emotion or don’t think it’s helped at all and try finding other ways to help their depression. Obviously the placebo effect wouldn’t be as strong as the SSRI itself. I’m sure there’s been many studies with giving someone a sugar pill claiming it was zoloft and giving others zoloft.

I highly recommend trying 5-HTP for those for depression. It has been studied to be just as or even more effective then SSRI’s for many people with little to no side effects.

Ah I see. I’ve never had a blackout drunk episode before, even when I almost had to go to the hospital when I was young and stupid so the thought frightens me.

You would be surprised. I believe the studies were that a placebo was just as effective as an SSRI. I’ll try to find it but my only source right now is pubmed. In it they said that while the SSRI affected the reuptake, the placebo affect actually increased the amount of seratonin, much like 5-HTP.

Yep. Tryptophan got a bad rep becuase of one tainted batch. It’s actually very effective but far less effecient than 5-HTP (1% conversion to seratonin vs. 98%) and the latter is one step closer to seratonin so it makes sense. It’s much like MDMA. It was a safe and effective drug but people started abusing it and making it in home labs and they banned it.

It’s funny becuase most of us are depressed because of things we can change: our enviroment, friends, diet, exercise, etc…. yet we just get prescribed drugs to mask it instead of changing. I doubt there was this large a percentage of people depessed 50 or 100 years ago and the only reason why it was never an issue was becuase of diagnosing limitations.

This has been proven wrong. Since they stopped giving SSRI’s to young teens, suicide rates have gone up.

interesting… I’ve tried 5-htp before and I love the stuff but I’ve never heard of rhodiola. I’ll have to give it a shot when I have the money.
rhodiola is like a counter to 5-HTP but they work together if that makes sense. It stabalizes mood like nothing else, gives you insane focus and combats fatigue. It works on seratonin but does so much more. It also works on pain via opiod receptors but have none of the bad consequences of morphine.

They did some double blind placebo studies and it significantly reduced the symptoms of moderate depression.

It’s incredibly popular in Asia, Germany, and many other areas but it’s really hard to grow(You need a really cold climate and 4 years) but it’s going to be more popular in North America I suspect as the gov’t of Alberta is doing a project right now to grow it up here and increase the world supply by 30%.
so i just started reading people have been gaining an excess or 20lbs or more over the course of a year taking lexapro.

most physicians/psychs say its not a side effect but so many people on the meds are reporting this.

lots of people are saying its either due to slowing down metabolism or once your anxiety is gone you burn less calories as opposed to when you are feeling very anxious.

anyone here have any personal experience?

Nobody’s requiring you to accept the prescription from the doctor. If you tell the doctor "I know from experience that Chemical X works just right" and he refuses to prescribe it, tell him you’ll take your business elsewhere. He might be working in your best interest, but he still needs to get paid.

If it’s a cortisol suppressant, then it will definitely increase your appetite and decrease your metabolism.

Whenever I get into a relationship with a woman, I get what basically amounts to a sustained panic attack that lasts for a couple of weeks, and I lose a good 20-25lbs as a result of no appetite and burning off energy by sprinting as fast as I can on my bike for an hour a day. I had my cortisol level measured once when I was going through that, and they said I should’ve been dead from it.

I was very hungry when it wore off.
lil update -

went back for my follow up appointment. he said he could see signs that I had ADD/ADHD and prescribed me adderall xr 20mg. Wow is all I can say. The clarity the drug provides is just incredible. All I wish is that I had this 3 years ago in college, wouldve aced everything.

I feel like a new man on it. Feels good to be normal again.
I hope that works out for you… personally I would stay away from using amphetamines no matter what the dose.

Thanks.

In all honesty I believe the Adderall works better than the xanax on so many levels.

I’m sure my anxiety was caused by the racing, unclear thoughts that plagued my mind. On adderall im focused and my mind is crystal fucking clear. Might even drop the xanax all together and stick on the adderall.

I’ll keep some updates after my best session but for the most part, I feel reborn.

exactly. I have awful anxiety, and lexapro has done wonders for me. It took 3 months about, but i havent had a hardcore panic attack or break downlike i was having before. Anytime u take a drug it will have side effects. Personally havent had any bad enough to consider stopping medication

no weight gain here.
kinda makes sense tho, the idea that u dont burn as many cals because ur body isnt always in overdrive so to speak

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The second issue is that I have a wicked addiction to pain killers. They dull the pain in my head and make things easier to do. The problem with that is the drugs keep me in a state where I am zoned out most of the time. I have tried several times to get off the painkillers, and crashed and burned. I am thinking of going to a detox center to get off the oxys.

Does anyone have some ideas on how to deal with this over whelming panic? I have been on every drug imaginable and they all have horrible side effects.

If anyone has ideas or places to do for treatment of anxiety, PM me or post please… thanks
What makes your anxiety worse? I’m sure over 20 years, you’ve gotten a grip on something or another that "causes" worse panic attacks. Also, whats your diet like?
My diet is pretty normal… i don’t smoke and only drink maybe once every 3 or 4 months. As far as what triggers my anxiety, i know what it is… when i am not in control of a situation, it makes me panic. Also, and probably more so, the fear of rejection in any for scares the shit out of me. I have terrible self esteem, and occasionally cut. The problem i have with therapists is twofold. First, i am one, i have a Master in social work, and second i am very intelligent and can think faster than they can. I need a therapist who can almost out-think me, if that makes any sense.

Therapist > drugs

How old r u?

When you were younger, how was your relationship with your parents? friends? Do you ever remembed a time that you weren’t in control of a situation and you might have been physically hurt, emotionally let down, etc? Were your parents control freaks? Did they demonstrate, even in a lesser form, any similar behaviours? I’ve come to learn that anxiety and panic are almost our bodies own ways of not letting go of the past, and then associating most if not all similar situations with maybe 1 or 2 from the past in order to avoid having the same negative results. example:

I used to witness my dad jumping away from people sneezing and making a big deal about it. We could NEVER walk in a hotel room without our slippers (which would be thrown away after our trip) because we would get warts from other people. Our meat would always be just about charred to avoid bacteria. If I was caught playing with a frog, I would be grounded because they give people warts. I could NEVER be barefoot. never. I could NEVER walk outside in my socks. Well, fast forward 20 years, and now I have anxiety, panic attacks, and severe hypochondria. I am constantly worrying about my health, I cover my mouth if someone else sneezes or coughs. At work, if I’m walking around and someone ahead of me sneezes, I’ll change routes through the store to avoid that area. I’m obsessed with hand sanitizer. I don’t even prepare my own chicken or beef because I’m too afraid of the blood and bacteria. When I go out and eat, I have to inspect my meat to make sure there is NO red at all. Basically, I’ve taken when I’ve learned from my dad, and increased the volume in my own life. Mine didn’t even occur during an "event." It was just how I was taught in my home life. Germs are bad. They give you warts and disease. Now, I believe that and am worse than my dad was.

That is why I like therapy, because as odd as it sounds, I NEVER made the connection to that until I was in week 4 or 5 of therapy. It was so obvious, but I didn’t even see it. Try to think back to your childhood. You can really learn alot about who you are.
As everyone else said, therapy. It has helped me a lot.

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I have a recurring issue with anxiety/panic attacks that I used to have constantly through college (19-20 yrs old), but recently they’ve come back happening about once a week (I just turned 25).

My question is, what do the anxiety meds out there do. The issue I have is once an attack starts towards the end of the night, I won’t be able to fall asleep, no matter how hard I try.

At this point, it’s 3am, and I’ve been anxious since 1130pm. When I try to lay down or close my eyes, I can relax myself for a minute, but then I’ll feel paniced again. Sometimes I can talk out the issue, but that’s become harder and harder to do and then fall asleep. Right now I can feel my eyes getting heavy, but if I actually laid down to sleep I know my chest would start racing again.

An example I have for how I can’t shake it when it starts, is that I’ll leave the house and go driver around to try to relax. I’ll feel tired/sleepy in the car, but the second I come in my room I feel anxious again. I keep feeling almost "drunk" as I type this, where my eyes will clothes, my head will feel heavy, and I’ll wake up with extra keys typed in the post.
Uh yes, obviously it’s worth it.

Edit: Seriously, wtf? That’s like having a broken hand and just being like "Well, it’s my left hand and I’m a righty, so I guess I don’t need to worry about it."

When I was in college and it happened frequently, I felt like it was taking an easy way out to deal with the issue. Now that I’m growing/grown-up, I realize that it’s not something that I can’t necessarly fix on my own, but that there’s nothing wrong with possibly taking drugs for it.
So I’m gonna type this quick because I think I’m starting to slip.

This is about 6 hours in now, and I’ve seen myself type this post about 10 times in my head now, and everytime I refresh the page, I realize I didn’t send it yet. I hope this all can inspire someone who mihgt be having the same problm.
If it’s affecting your daily routine then see a doctor and look at getting on meds for it.

If it’s manageable, still go see a doctor and see about getting help other than medication for it.
Just be careful with the meds, Im starting to develop a dependence on Xanax due to recent events.
i’ve had no luck with therapists or meds for my anxiety issues and yea they will keep me up all night. the only thing i found that helps is to try and meditate on something like my breathing. listening to each breath trying to make them the exact same as the last. if i can focus all of my thought on something like that, everything else kind of melts away. sometimes i fall asleep but most the time i just lie there doing the meditation thing and it’s usually just as good as sleep. i call it fake sleep.
Anti-anxiety meds are nice but they have side effects

I have recently made major changes in my diet, like cutting out almost all sugar and not drinking coffee. Sometimes a slice of brown bread, a glass of water, and a phone call to my mom is all I need. Sometimes breathing into a paper bag can help the breathing.

Late night anxiety is horrible because you can’t really call anyone. Do you have a friend who is up all night?
If you aren’t working on it yourself then yes, you should either seek therapy or seek meds.

I felt exactly that way a few years ago, got on Zoloft and felt 1000x better. I’m off of it now and I rarely gets attacks and can actually get to sleep before 3am.
OK. I understand the feelings your having. I have had panic attacks on and off now for almost 6 years. Mine always happen at night, well, 99.9% of the time at night. The reason your anxiety gets better while your out driving is because your not thinking about it. Then you come home, don’t have anything to keep your mind busy, and you start worrying about it again.

Think of anxiety like this. You are in a safe bubble. Nothing can come in and hurt you, ever. You are walking around, and the Boogie Man jumps out and tries to scare you. If you look over and say "OK… your stupid, go away" and leave it at that, the Boogie Man feels pwned, so he goes away. However, if the Boogie Man jumps out, and you panic, he’ll keep scaring you. But remember, you’re in your safe bubble. Even if you get scared of the Boogie Man, he can still never harm you, just scare you more. Which is why if he jumps out, and you go driving and stop thinking about him, he goes away, but the second you start feeling a little scared of him, he’ll jump at the chance to scare you again.

Anxiety is indirectly caused by you. I know, when people used to say "It’s all in your head" to me I used to get pissed off, but its partially true. Anxiety can strike anyone, at any time, for any reason. Its just a normal feeling of defense. The problem is, sometimes we feel that for reasons we don’t directly see, or most of the time, for no reason at all. The problem isn’t the panic attack itself, its how WE see the panic attack. example:

I deal with occasional panic attacks while sleeping. I’ll be like, 90% asleep, and bam, it’ll hit. I’ll jump out of bed, heart racing, freaking out, short of breath, kinda lightheaded, etc. Then, it’s a chore to fall back asleep, cuz I’m thinking "omg, what if it’s something worse, what if I need to go to the ER, what if it happens again." Yadda yadda. So the other night, I got that feeling again, and I said "Oh for fucks sake, this again, I am too tired for this shit." I layed my head back down, and I could almost physically feel the panic just weaken and weaken until I was like "holy shit, I stopped it dead in it’s tracks!" And then I went to bed. Happened last night actually. I jumped out of bed, got half way to my bedroom door to go smoke and do my usual shit, but I was like "Oh fuck this" and layed back down and went right to sleep. It’s all how you view the panic attack. If you don’t give it anything to feed on, it can’t feed and will stop. And it might come back, but if you learn to never give it any credit, it will weaken and weaken and effect you less and less.

SOME, say medication helps, but I believe it helps more for situational anxiety. My dad suffered panic attacks while my mom was preggo with me since she was really sick and I had like a 5% chance of living. He never had panic attacks before, or after that. So, maybe meds help with situational anxiety, but, if there are deeper causes, rooted inside your head, I personally, not being a Doctor, don’t believe in anxiety medication. To touch on the broken hand comment… Taking meds for Anxiety is like taking a pain killer for a broken hand. It might weaken the SYMPTOMS of the broken hand, but it will never fix the CAUSE of the symptoms, and when you stop, your hand is still broken.

Some simple things I would do if I were you.

1) STOP any and all caffeine.
2) Walk regularly. Panic attacks cause adrenaline, and if you don’t burn it up, it builds and can aid in causing panic attacks.
3) Talk to your anxiety. I know, it sounds weird, but it helps me. If you feel an attack coming, say "OK, I guess today I’m going to see what life is like with anxiety, but whatever, thats fine, I can still function with a little funky feeling. It’s not like it’s going to harm me or anything, so whatever, lets see how bad it can try to be this time." Sounds nuts, but it helps me.
4) Learn about anxiety. I was terrified when it started, because I had no idea WTF was wrong with me. Go to the library and research anxiety and panic attacks.
5) Watch your breathing when feeling anxious. Shallow breathing is very common and can cause more anxiety. Research breathing techniques for dealing with anxiety and use them.
6) See a therapist, be 100% honest with him/her and see if you can uncover any underlying things from your past that would cause these types of feelings. It was the most obvious thing for me, but it took therapy for me to connect the dots, but once I did, it was the most relaxing and refreshing feeling.

Good luck, you can get over it if you put your mind to it.

Keep searching for a therapist, you havent found the right one yet.

eh i’m sick of throwing money away for someone to pretend to care

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Anyway, it triggered me thinking of death and the fact that one day I might have the same mental faculty I have right now, but be looking back over 70+ years of life, and forward to 10 more minutes, and after that, nothing.

I dwelled on that momentarily and all of a sudden couldn’t breath, chest got tight, felt sick to my stomach and brain didn’t feel like normal. It was very disturbing. I felt completely out of sorts.

I drove home in a daze, still feeling that way, and it lasted for over 10 min.

Feel OK now, still get a little queasy when I consider death, but I feel very drained as well.

The disturbing part is that this kind of happened 3 nights ago. As I went to turn my bedside lamp off, I got very panicked over sort o the same subject.

Was this a real panic attack, or just some sick worry?
please don’t ever drive while having a panic attack you could hurt yourself or possibly others

it sounds about like what happens to me during a panic attack except i usually feel like i am dying and lose my sense of reality where sometimes i’ll scream out. i actually thought one was a heart attack and went to the hospital only to be told to see a shrink and get put on medication.

i just avoid large crowds and situations where a lot of people are looking at me. i’ve never had one thinking about death only thinking about being up in front of a large audience who are all staring at me. i can usually avoid mine but when they happen i try to force my mind on something else. i’ll stare at a mark on the wall or something and focus all my thoughts on that and try to think of that mark being my safe place.

it’s weird but something i’ve learned to do that helps.

i’m no therapist but i would suggest exploring why death bothers you so much. it might not be something you should do alone though. that’s usually why the doctors suggest a therapist because they can help you figure out why you are having them and once you come to terms with whatever it is that is the cause you will stop having them.

That’s easy. I don’t want to die.

why does it bother you to the point of having panic attacks?
There is life after death, and if you don’t believe that then you can say when i die there won’t be any pain so at least i won’t feel any bad things after it happens. Its a win win situation.

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My fiance picked up the clonazepam for me today in hopes that I can take it and feel comfortable enough to go to my cousins graduation party tomorrow afternoon. I was really nervous about even taking the pill after reading all the side effects and what not but after spazzing about it for most of the evening i finally popped one to see how it makes me feel.

I guess what i’m getting at is, i don’t understand how a little pill can make me want to go out to dinner or have people over if my mind is so set that it’s not going to work. I could used some reassurance from someone who has been in this situation. Reassurance that this stuff can/will work and i can get back to my normal self. I really do miss going out to the bar with friends or out to dinner which i haven’t done for almost 2 years now.

Any help you guys could give me to ease my mind would really really be appreciated.
You know when you’re drunk, and you just don’t give a fuck. And you’ll make an ass out of yourself in front of everybody.

Should have that kind of effect, except, you know, a lot milder. should slow down your mind, let you relax in situations you would be panicking/thinking to much in.

i’ve never gotten drunk enough to make an ass of myself but i understand what you mean. I think i can handle that… or so i hope
What works for me is to stop thinking and just do it. The moment you start thinking is actually the moment you stop doing. Instead of Omg Omg Omg , just put your mind on blank and do it.

Then you see its actually meaningless to get worried over things.
I used to have the same thing before being prescribed xanax.

I never really thought drugs would help but they do immensely. For years I had pretty bad social anxiety and agoraphobia as a result. With a few benzos i’m almost back to normal and can function. Give it a shot then a real psychiatrist and go over your problems with him and hopefully they help you out. Beware though, most psychiatrists don’t like to prescribe benzos because they are highly addictive.

GL to you.
I had an issue a couple years ago where I was getting these panic attacks. I think they were associated with my arachnaphobia.
I would get wound up for whatever reason – and then I wouldn’t wind down.
It was like, I would see a bug, freak out and then for the rest of the day I would be getting spooked by shadows, I would be unable to think straight, I couldn’t make decisions.
The only thing that really set me straight was a good nights sleep.

My doctor perscribed me…. xanax (maybe, I get so confused with these drugs).

I found the stuff kind of odd in the way it worked.

Cause, it worked. When I was in a state like that I would take a pill and it calmed me the hell down. I still keep some around for emergency’s, even though I haven’t needed it for over a year.

What I found strange is that if I don’t need it, say I a just sitting around bored and I take one it really doesn’t do anything. Just makes me a bit sleepy.

I found this weird cause I have heard a lot about people getting addicted to these things. I thought there would be some sort of high if you didn’t need it. All I got was sleepy.
I think what you’re experiencing is quite common (a relative of mine once when through it). One really bad experience will set up a "what if" trigger (as she described it) in your mind that, when applied to any potential situation, incites panic or paranoia. A lot of people experience this in very low doses and either overcome it or develop it into their personality (naturally shy people).

Starting slow with small things, sometimes aided by medication (such as the kind you’ve been prescribed), will set a reversing lifestyle trend that will get you back to where you want to be.

But here’s the bottom line: Taking the medication is an enabler, you still need to take the baby steps towards the lifestyle you want. You can do it, it just takes time and patience. Start small by going and grabbing a coffee or some lunch, and build from there. I’m sure that soon you’ll be back to the bars splitting a pitcher with some friends.
You lost me Mustafa. Do you mean ‘enabler’ in a good way?

Most of the time I see that word it is very negative.

I know for me when I took the xanax it allowed me to get control of myself so I could resolve my problems. I suppose it was an ‘enabler’ in the way it enabled me to get beyond the panic and take control of the situation.
Yes, you’re right Stilgar1973, enabler often carries a negative connotation.

I mean here that medication, while an asset to the recovery process, is not the instant cure. It instead enables you to start taking the small steps towards social comfortability, which eventually will lead to the lifestyle you want. You can take the medication all day but fail to take the steps to begin the re-orientation process of social life, then you’re still stuck where you’re started off. Ideally, once confidence is restored, the need for medication should not exist.

Sheana: Just remember to start small. I remember my cousin started off going over to friend’s houses when she knew there would be less than 10 people there, hanging out until she felt comfortable enough to go get a quick lunch, and then eventually dinner, and so on until stadium seating at a football arena was not terrifying. It’s confidence in yourself that will be what helps you the most in this circumstance. Best of luck!
I went to my cousins graduation party over the weekend and i had absolutely no panic I took one of the pills before i left the house and then was fine for the rest of the day. It felt so good to be "normal" again. After a few more outings with the help of my meds i think i’ll be able to start going out without the meds as a crutch.

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I think it all stems from a fear of not having enough money. I was talking to my mom the other day and I told her I wouldn’t be comfortable unless I had enough money for 10 years of living expenses in a liquid account.

A little background:

I’m 26. My previous job was my first job out of college, and I was there for almost 2 years. I worked in systems development, and it sucked. I would work 50, 60, 70 hours a week on salary (no overtime pay) with mandatory weekends and pretty much as much bullshit as you could imagine. This was a big, international HR firm, and our company engagement scores were around 25/100 (which is absolutely horrible). Basically, no one was happy there. People in the development teams had job stress-induced illnesses. I would see people cry at work, etc. Sometimes I’d go home at night at come back the next day and there were still people there who hadn’t gone home. One of our programmers worked a 35 hour shift once. People’s families would come visit them at work because the employees never got to go home. And all of this for shitty pay and 0-1% raises.

Alright, so I had been thinking about quitting for a while, but one weekend I decided to finally do it. I gave 2 days notice and quit. I had at least 6 months worth of living expenses saved up in a liquid account at this point, plus I cashed out 21 days of PTO which is over 4 weeks worth of pay, so that was a nice bonus.

I was so stressed out from that job I was then unemployed for about 6 months, by choice. I was literally so mindfucked from that job that I didn’t do much for the next 3-4 months. I would sleep in until noon. I had no motivation to do anything. And through the whole thing, I felt secure because I had enough in the bank for a few more months…

Anyway, that experience made me realize that I was lucky to be able financially to up and quit my job. There were so many people there who hated it but couldn’t quit because they were living paycheck to paycheck.

I think that now I’m terrified of being in that position again. I’m always asking myself "what if I get fired? What if I have to quit?" Finding a new job is fucking impossible. "What if I can’t find a new job?" I’m consumed by the need to have enough money so that not finding a job won’t be a problem because I won’t need money.

As a result, this affects my social life. I am a fucking cheapass. I don’t go out downtown because I can’t afford it. Ok, I’m lying. I can afford it, but I don’t want to, because going out and spending $15 per drink is fucking lame. I can’t justify spending $50-100 in one night because "what if I have to quit my job? What if I get fired? What if I can’t find a job?" I might need the $15 from that drink to buy me a few meals at Wendy’s. I don’t go to nice places to eat because fast food is cheaper and spending $50 on a meal is pointless when you’re getting the same amount of calories that you could get for $4 someplace else.

I should note, however, that when someone invites you to go someplace, and you say "sorry, I can’t afford it," you don’t usually get shit because most people are so in debt that they assume you really can’t afford it, either (altho that doesn’t stop them from doing it). I say "I can’t afford it" because I don’t want to say "I don’t want to waste my money on that."

Some of my friends give me shit, but I can’t help but think "fuck them." Some of my friends my age make $60-100k per year (which I am *insanely* jealous of) and they party like rockstars, yet they only have a few thousand saved up. "What if you lose your job?" I want to ask them. "You’ll be fucked because you have no savings." And then I imagine myself in that position and I become terrified… like literally, I have a mini-anxiety attack.

Now normally I think it’s good to be frugal and concerned about your finances, but I think it’s consuming me to the point that it’s unhealthy. I realized that when I told my mom that I wanted 10 years worth of savings in a liquid account in order to feel "secure," and then I realized that I was 100% serious when I said that. And that 10 years means no change in quality of lifestyle, either. Even thinking about it now, as I’m typing this, makes me think 10 years of savings wouldn’t be enough to feel comfortable.

How do I un-consume myself with money without taking the complete opposite approach and not giving a shit and getting to debt, etc. I know "you only live once" so people are going to tell me to spend more and have fun, but when if after I spend it, I need it, and I don’t have it because I pisssed it away on $100 bar tabs?
id rather be you than me. i have no value for money at all. im not saying i spend it recklessly but i dont pay attention most of the time. i gamble so money comes and goes.
Sounds like you’re pretty good at managing finances…good for you. If I had a little more sense to be as careful as you were in my early 20s, I wouldn’t have spent the few years after that getting out of debt.

But if managing money consumes you, I agree that isn’t healthy. Life isn’t all about money right? I think as we will all one day lie on our death beds, the last thing we will think fondly of is how much money we have in the bank.

What you need to do is turn your skills at money management in your favor such that you wouldn’t need to worry so much about it. Have it work for you. Perhaps put portions of that away into more long term investments where your money earns you even more. If you just have that money sitting around in some savings acct, it’s just money sitting there waiting to be given to someone else.

Another method that could help is to plan a budget. Use a spreadsheet and just work out how your cash flow is month to month. Set aside some for retirement, some for bills, some for a rainy day, and don’t forget some for fun too. If you plan ahead this way, you may feel more secure in knowing you can freely spend $50 on that next meal without it meaning that you’ll suddenly go broke.

EDIT: I know where you’re coming from, now as I’m running my own business, it freaks me out senseless when I don’t have "padding" in my bank accounts not knowing month to month how my revenue will be. You have to then realize that it’s not the money itself that is causing you to freak, but maybe the insecure feeling that there are things you can’t control. Perhaps just accept that feeling and have confidence that you can deal with anything that comes your way in the future WHEN it comes.
Its not a bad thing. Im pretty much exactly like you. Only real downside was that girls I date usually complain about me being cheap, but you know something, to some people money is the only thing that can bring happiness. Thats how it is for me. Theres a huge pot of wealth out there for people and I want a large share. And apparently my life is being controlled by the thought of me getting the biggest share possible.

The journey will take you down many paths and you will come across a lot of obsticles on the way, but remember to learn from your mistakes, identify the mistakes others make, identify what successful people are doing. It makes life a lot more interesting and it gives you something to work for. Set yourself a goal, stay at or beyond that goal(budget) at all times and you will be destined for a financially comfortable life.
Thanks for the replies. I have investments, a Roth IRA, a 401(k), and a trading account.

It’s not that money makes me happy, per se, it’s just that I don’t feel comfortable unless I have enough of it. There’s enough to worry about in life and I don’t want not having enough money to be something else I have to worry about. It’s just that thought that consumes me. It sucks.
Well, if a pile of money were dumped on you today, you may be happy. But we all know that’s a temporary feeling.

I think it’s a matter of perspective…go travel a little bit this year and just observe how people outside of what you know are perfectly happy with so much less. Then you can come back and adjust a little. It helps me focus all the time in what’s most important in life.
From your posts here and in the Vag I actually do think you’re kinda OCD, but whatever. I make decent money for my age and I spend that shit like water. Needless to say I’m not in debt or anything…but I go to Vegas and drop $500 or go to the store and drop $100 on booze for my friend’s party etc etc. I dunno, I think not letting yourself go out with friends just to save money is lame. There are ways to save money and go out. Drink before you go out… Just buy one drink when you go out and then refill with water so you don’t get shit from friends. Bring a flask (but be careful and only drink it in the bathroom or alley). It’s really good to be frugal and save money, just remember, you can’t take that shit with you. And fuck, if you ever get married and then divorced the bitch is gonna take most of it anyway.
Well ask yourself the question , what if i die today? You can’t take your money beyond the grave. We had a guy in here who got into a car accident, and while he was ‘ omg my car’ , we were ‘be glad you came out alive of it’

Ok, you have the feeling you need to survive. Which is ok, well once you have a job your income is secured’ But what if? That’s the thing, you shouldn’t base your life on what if, but on what is. And instead of letting your life be guided by fear and disasters, think by yourself ‘i can only control the things i can control, and its useless to worry about the things i cannot control, because it might happen regardless of what i do.

Or in other words, the end of your job is not the end of your life. How many homeless people survive for years without even having a penny? Yeah its the gutter without a doubt, not a recommended place to be at all however these people are far more free from their materialistical conserns then normal people.

I think i have a story you should definitly read this with a big huge cup of coffee as it is long.

Nope. Because I would set it up so that it was continual income and I wouldn’t touch the principle.

That’s why i would look into offshore bank accounts and asset protection before I got married. You never know what’s going to happen in 10 years and I don’t want to lose my money because a woman changed her mind.
When is the last time you went on a vacation that had no financial ramifications?
I have amost the exact same viewpoints on money/savings as you do. Personally mine stems from my parents having money trouble when I was younger.
I’m fourtanate that my husband and I are well off; however even though we are, I always ask myself if we will be ok if one of us loses our job, gets sick, etc.

I haven’t taken a vacation. I don’t know how much a vacation costs, but I assume I would be able to afford it. That being said, I’d rather have the money. Then again, my last job wouldn’t let me use the PTO to take a vacation, anyway. They gave me the PTO, they just wouldn’t let me use it without "paying" for it (making up the hours before hand).

edit – all vacations have financial ramifications by definition if they cost money, even if they cost $0.01.

Possible.

Look the point isn’t that it’s bad you have high goals set for your financial security…but it’s not unreasonable to have a budget designed so you can still reach your financial goals while still having some money to spend for fun with your friends. Life doesn’t just give you these two extremes….debt or wealth. There’s a lot of area in between that you can be comfortable with while you work upwards. You just gotta plan it out so you know exactly how you’re going to reach that goal you want.

I can understand not wanting to spend money on drinks and resturants but I would at least take a vacation. I think you could use one, I get the impression from your posts on here that you aren’t really a very happy person. You’ve gotta reward yourself for your hard work and take time to enjoy life. It’s great to want to save money but what good is it if you never have any fun with it? I’m sure you can easily spare a few hundred dollars to get away for a little while.
Yeah that’s not OCD…

but good for you for being good with money

Yeah, you need to take a vacation. Take a three-day weekend ad visit decent city somewhere. Augusta, GA, Destin, FL, something like that. With air fare, lodging, etc, you can get by on well under $400. That’s not bad for a vacation. Sounds like you need a practical exercise in sitting back and enjoying life.
Sounds like your just frugal.

I try to get the most bang for my buck when I go out. 4$ glass of import beer…or $1 draught Bud Light? And Whiskey on the Rocks goes even farther, because you can’t drink it near as fast.

Same with food. I eat on the dollar menu when I can.

But don’t take it too far or you’ll end up like my ex. Bitch would have panic attacks over 10,000$ in student loans when she graduated.
I’ll take 3 day weekends sometimes, I just stay at home and relax and watch TV or play guitar or do whatever.

I go on business trips occasionally, and while it’s not all leisure, I still get to visit different places (hotels/restaurants/bars) mostly on my company’s money. It’s relatively relaxing.

The other day I ordered a pint of Guinness and it was $6. I was like wtf? After that I started getting $3.25 bottles.

I think part of the reason I’m like this is I am very lazy. My goal is to retire ASAP because I don’t like working. No, wait, I don’t like having to work. I feel like I need to accumulate much wealth now because my laziness will probably overtake me in the future.

Wendy’s ftmfw.

Mah Nigga.

I don’t really see you as being OCD about money. I freak out now and then too, usually when I’m doing my loans for school and realise I’m graduating 60k in debt.

But like today, I needed new brakes on my car. I could pay 80$ for new rotors and pads, or 89$ for a local shop to put on new pads for me and turn the rotors. Hmmm, yeah, I’d rather pay 9$ extra to not spend a few hours getting greasy as fuck under my car.

Yeah, see that’s totally different from what I recommended.
holy shit dude. You’re what’s on the other side of my mirror.

I need to be you for a year. Learn the ropes.

Or just hang out with people like you.
Or go read "Smart Couples Finish Rich" (or some other book like it) and "the Millionaire Next Door."

I track everything in Excel. I have a line chart on one of the tabs that shows total liquid assets (checking account money + trading account) that I update a few times a month. I like it when the line goes up. I don’t like it when the line goes down. Obviously I have an interest bearing checking account (for those of you who were going to say "dude, if you like money so much why is it sitting in a checking account that doesn’t pay interest").

My point is, if you want to get better with money, start tracking everything you spend. You’ll start to think about things differently. Save your receipts. Start easy… make an Excel file to track income (paychecks, eBay, finding $5 on the ground) and expenses (bills, things you pay cash for, OT subscriptions, etc.). Record everything. Total everything up at the end of each month. You should have a positive balance (most of the time, sometimes crazy expenses come up and that’s what you NEED money for). Just do it for a month and see how it goes. It’s 3/2. Start today cuz it’s a new month.
Falconer,

I have a new respect for you… I’m the same exact way. I cannot be happy unless I have a good amount of savings. And that good amount is definitely about 5 years of liquid $ for my expenses…

I am a big saver, and my friends know I’m a big saver, and always say, "Why don’t you buy blah blah blah…?"

But I don’t because I just like to save, even though I do drool over a lot of nice material things I don’t need or want to spend money on.
Doesn’t really sound OCD, you just sound paranoid. However that doesn’t matter, if you have a few months worth of savings to keep yourself afloat in case of an emergency you should be fine. I’d say don’t let it get to you, but it sounds like it does, and as for how to become apathetic towards certain things in life I don’t know how to teach that to anyone. But if it really bothers you see a doctor, maybe get some pills.

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