my g/f and I are both young (24) and I am a young professional while she is kind of a student. due to my job demands I have been working like a dog lately and its always cut down on the time we see each other. throughout our relationship (5 years) we have always seen each other 1-2 a week, with once a week being most common.

recently, she was diagnosed with a digestive disease whereby she has flare ups where she is in alot of stomach pain. due to the recent diagnosis, she is currently on varying medications to find dosages that allow proper treatment of the "flare ups". this disease has really cut into the time we see each other, as well as the time we talk to each other. when she has her flare-ups she is basically in such pain that she has to rest all day and when I talk to her on the phone it is obvious she is in alot of pain and has to make alot of effort just to talk to me

I just want to be there for her and help comfort her. this is all very new to her and I think she’s struggling both with coping with the symptoms but also with the knowledge that for the rest of her life she will have to deal with this disease. this has had a big impact on any professional aspirations she has because when she has these flare-ups she basically can’t do anything at all…

I’m just looking for advice for what I can do to let her know I’m there and to comfort her.
uhmm…it’s real simple…you don’t have to "let her know" anything. Your words are meaningless in this regard.

You let her know by being there and comforting her. It’s not rocket science. If you aren’t there…you can’t say, just ask and I’ll be there. Fuck that…go…..be there. Don’t make them ask.

Be patient and kind, look for things you can do to make her feel better. Favorite movie…go rent it, she like to dance, put on her fav music and dance in the living room. There are literally 1000s of ways to help her….you just have to open your heart and think….what does she like to do or like to have?

Do NOT focus on what you would like….who gives a shit about you….it’s all about her. She’s the one suffering and being there means getting out of yourself and your shit. You get all up in her shit.

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