Hi everyone. So here is the deal. Back in March over spring break I met this more amazing guy, or so I thought. I came back to college all excited about finally meeting this new guy and how happy I was to hangout w/him again. So I am sitting in the lounge telling my friends about him and showing a few friends his picture. They were all like hes wicked cute and seems pretty chill. So meanwhile I am talking to him online while I am telling my friends about him and we are planning a time to hang out. He asked me do you have a friend for my room mate, so I obviously think YES my single best friend. So I told him yes and he goes can we see a picture so I said sure. I show him a picture of her and he is like can I have her screeen name so I can give it to my room mate. So stupid me is like yes sure of corse! Little did I know he started talking to her and he wanted her. He asked her out on a date later that night after talking to her for 45 mins. Yet he continued to still talk to me and talk about our date and "us". So my friend tells me he asked me out and I said yes. So I’m pissed bc i want him but because I am a people pleaser and I cant say NO I said fine you can have him. So we hangout and we all have fun. To make a long story short, they have been dating for 3 months now and they are talking about marriage and a life together. I am also still really resentful,jealous and mad! I want him soo bad but I know he is a scumbag. He has also had a shaky past and is a pathological liar. Am i doing myself a favor by not being with this scum bag? Should I be supportive of my best friend? Should I tell my best friend the awful things he has done to people in the past and if so how do I do that without sounding like a jealous bitch who wants to break them up? What are everyone’s thoughts?? thanks everyone!

lc
You cant tell your friend these things without sounding like a Jealous bitch who wants them to break up, because you are a jealous bitch who wants them to break up.

That being said.

You talked up this guy, he wants your friend more than you. So deal with it.

Go find another guy, a better guy who didn’t do all those bad things to people in the past, and who isn’t a pathological liar.

You don’t need this one. Get a better one. You have the power of the Vag. Get whatever one you want.
sounds like a shitty guy to begin with, there’s no reason for you to be jealous. he’ll probably just use her to get at her friends, so just be there for her when she gets hurt
Ditch them both, you will have plenty of drama if you dont.
Your bestfriend is not your friend at all. She could of rejected him, but chose to go after him. Be glad that you found out about this dude now than later.

Time to find another best friend and a man.
I understand that you liked the guy but honestly ask yourself why. Knowing all the "bad" stuff he’s done in the past why would you want to be with him. If your friend knew you liked this guy and still went after him thats not a very good friend. I’d distance myself for sure from the guy he isn’t worth your time and I’d reevaluate your friendship with your friend.
Thanks guys for all the advice, the thing is,he always talks to me and its hard to escape him….he’s always up in my grill talking to me and asking for my help…….i dont really like him anymore but its just annoying…
Ignore his phone calls, texts, emails, instant messages, etc. Only way to get him out of your life. As for your "best friend" stealing your man - I would re-evaluate your relationship. That’s a pretty shitty thing to do, and you should have stood up for yourself and told her how you felt from the beginning.
forget about the guy, he’s not worth the trouble. ignore him and cut him out of your life, he’s of no benefit to you, except if you’re okay being his rebound/sex buddy.

as far as your friend, she really didn’t steal him from you. it was a crap move on her part, but you also told her she can have him. depending on the strength of the friendship (girls use "best friend" way too much), you may need to cut her loose as well, keep your distance for the time being, or try to maintain the friendship.
you guys had not agreed to be monogamous so i’m not seeing any theft here.
Everyone has said all there is to say.

He can only annoy you if you choose to let him annoy you. Stop talking to/seeing him and that girl that’s definitely not your best friend.

Learn from this. He’s not worth it.

FUCKING
A cute face doesn’t mean a kind heart (just heard that on a song on the radio lol) and its meant for this thread especially,

Well then let me give you some special advice , imagine you are on an island and while you walk thru the jungle by pure coinsidence you stumble on a huge treasure,you run back to a local village and you tell about this to the local pirates (your female (pirate) friends)in the bar you found a big treasure at location X, now you go and guess how big the chance is you treasure will be stolen? Pretty big if you ask me.

Its basically a problem you have, you need to learn to say NO and keep your mouth shut, you don’t have to tell everything you know. For you its a good thing to THINK first,Think about the risks of what you say and do before you spill your mouth to the bloodhounds.

You were lucky the guy seemingly was a jerk, but you don’t want this stuff happening when your dream prince comes along, although not perfect but good enough to be your SO so to speak. Be carefull hon.

Not kidding.

404 best friend and good guy not found.

Don’t waste your time, doll.
honestly… i don’t know why you’re calling him a scumbag. i mean yeah, he should have had the balls to tell you that he was interested in your friend and not you, but the fact is that he likes her more than you. big deal you didn’t date him, you didn’t know him for that long. put yourself in his position; what if you met some girl that you kinda liked, and then met a girl who you thought could be THE ONE. would you go out with the first girl because you felt bad, even though you have no real "claim" to her? no, you would put your happiness first, which is exactly what you should do now. be happy that he and your friend have found something special together, and keep your eye out for guys that are actually into you.

i had a similar situation happen to me a while back. only my best friend didnt tell me this guy had contacted her and i was in the dark for quite some time. but looking back on it, if he was so interested in her, then he obviously wasnt the right guy for me. yes, he should have been up front with you, and he shouldnt really be talking to you any more

as for your friend, i would just be aware of the type of person she is. she did let you know that he asked her out, which is good that she didnt try and hide it from you, but she also said yes knowing you really liked the guy. i wouldnt distrust her completely, just have your eyes open

in my situation, i stopped talking to the guy immediately. he wasnt worth it. it took me 3 years to talk to the girl again. we are friends now, but its a different type of relationship than it was before.

i would just stop communication with him altogether. he doesnt like you, there is no reason for you to be talking to him anyway. you probably only like him cause he is someone you cant have

oh yeah, and i quoted kiri cause i like the way she stated everything

Forget him.

Grow up.

Enough said.
3 months and they’re talking about marriage? hahahaha that’s going to fail quick
yeah tell me about it…he bought her 1200dollar 3 stone diamond "promise ring" more like an cheap engagment ring if i say so haha but hes not giving it to her until the end of the summer / beginning of the next school year…..he told me im making his toast at his wedding for getting them together!my friends and i r plotting for them to fail and have bets on it!its a fun game haha!
Hey guys? Why don’t we stop talking about how the best friend isn’t really a best friend. We can’t do anything about that. Let’s instead focus on helping the OP improve herself. The whole thing kinda reeked of pettiness and immaturity…let’s see if we can give her tips on how to prevent this in the future.

Two things I can think of. Work on your spelling, punctuation, and grammar. Your post was difficult to read.

Second, you admit to knowing this guy doesn’t sound so great…why do you want him? Does this happen often?

Also, seconding what kiri said. So some guy didn’t like you, even though you liked him. It happens. It will happen again. Getting all bent out of shape and whining like a little girl (yes, that it what you sounded like to me, some petty junior high/high school girl).

I’ve encountered little girls like this before…they tend to think that just because they have boobs and a pussy, all men should like them, or think they are attractive. That doesn’t happen. We real men don’t treat every woman like a princess…we treat them like just another person. If we don’t really like you, we’re not gonna spend time with you.

How old are you, btw?

Reread your post. If I’m understanding this right, you hung out in person once, or not at all…and 3 fucking months later, you’re still hung up on this guy?!? Think about this: What does this say about you?

nerd

How old are you all?
it’s better to have found that out before you got involved. as for your friend, well, keep your friends close and your enemies closer…

Don’t worry bout him or her and start using the power of being a woman to find what you really want in a guy/partner!

Just curious, what does this mean?
it means women are pyschic, we always know when were going to get laid

most of the time men know if/when they are going to get laid too.

What’s your point?
The point being is that most women just have to say yes. We don’t have to do the mating/courtship dance…thats all…and that is a line that i was told by a guy, btw.

Most likely true. You do however have to get all dressed up and make yourself look attractive…unless you think you could get laid by just getting out of bed, throwing on some deodorant, and going out then.

But we’re getting off topic here. Hopefully the OP will come back and give us some updates/answers.
Actually some of my favorite sex is morning sex, before the getting all dressed up and looking good, but yeah, i agree with you on that, women do ALOT to get noticed, but we have to stand out to get your attention and keep it and than say yes…lol, but your right, way off topic…funny how that happens
bunny, this mindset is dangerous for girls who aren’t naturally social.

their introversion keeps them from getting approached by guys because they come off as aloof…

but since they are trained by people like you and the guy who told you that line, that "girls just have to say yes", like it’s automatic, they think they are ugly or not attractive to guys, since they’re never approached.

when in reality it’s got nothing to do with deficiency of their natural beauty. just a lack of exhibitionism and social comfort.

im 19 and shes 18 and hes 20 and for the record i hung oout with him once and then i hung out wiht him all the times my friends had him back at our placee( she was my room mate)

wow. All I have to say is, grow the fuck up. Jesus christ.

yeah umm… you had no claim to him. none. You have no reason to complain that he went for someone else. You do have some grounds to complain that your friend went after a guy you liked, but then again, you’re both young and immature, it happens all the time. At this stage, everything is purely superficial
on the bright side, your best friend didn’t steal anything from you.
Use this as a learning experience. At the very least, learn to let things go. I’d understand being a little upset if this had JUST happened, but it’s been 3 months, right?

He moved on with his life. Your friend moved on with her life. Yet you’re STILL worrying about this guy.

He probably didn’t like you that much. Get over it, move the fuck on with your life.

And just so you know…behavior like this is VERY UNATTRACTIVE to a lot of guys. Keep it in mind.

I figured.

Seriously though, this is long over with and is nothing you should be stressing this much about. You are in college with thousands of other guys. Get out and meet some. In a year you’ll look back on this and smack yourself in the head for ever giving a shit.

so girls figure out what they want in a guy by fucking a bunch of them? wow, i feel like i’ve just been let in on the biggest female secret of all time
Honey? Go fuck ten other men. It’s ridiculous to be pining over this loser when you’re this young and in a setting full of attractive guys in college.

Try not to blame your best friend for being young and easily swayed by "love". I’m sure you’ve been there.
You had your shot. You guys went out but he wanted somebody else. Have some self respect. Why would you want to be someone’s second choice? Unless you just wanted to fuck him. If so then by all means go for it. Not that I’d condone it, but if you want to break them up, go to him and suggest a 3some with you and your friend. He’ll probably say yes and she’ll get very pissed off.

You only know when you’re going to get laid because it isn’t hard to find a hard-up guy ready to get his dick wet. You go to the bar with the intent on getting laid and you will get laid. I don’t have anything clever to say so you can consider the rest of this post my obligatory comment regarding most women and their whorism.

On the same note…most guys can go to that same bar and find some woman who is either just horny and wants to get laid, or a girl who is insecure and just looking for validation through sex.

But, bunnyblueeyes, don’t you dare think that no women ever have to work to get sex. If a decent guys isn’t just looking for sex, he’s going to make you earn it in some way or another.

Basically…lose the "I’m entitled to sex just because I’m a girl" attitude. It’s not a good thing to promote.

while she’s right that girls can get laid anytime they want, if they want a quality man, then they do have to work for it

they can also just be hot

they still have to work for a quality man

hot girls are usually lazy about love though, and don’t, because they’re so used to everything being given to them, which is why you tend to see hot girls with assholes

o rlly. usually i see hot girls with good guys who whiny little bitches call "assholes".

.

And if you cant handle the fact that they are dating, you are best to try and stop talking to them. You are just goona get hung up on what happned and never get over him.

+1 Why’s this guy automatically a scumbag? Sounds like you guys only went out on a date or two. That does not constitute anything. I’ve dropped and been dropped by women after a date or two. No big deal. He wasn’t that into you, and liked your roommate more. That’s life. Get over it. I’ve met someone before, then met her roommate, and just liked the roommate more, so pursued the roommate. If you aren’t serious, then everyone is free game. I wouldn’t blame your friend either. Perhaps, those two just have more in common than you and him. Just because she’s your best friend doesn’t mean she can’t date someone she has a lot in common with. So what if you met the guy first.
Be glad your friend ended up with him instead of you. Seems like someone you shouldnt want to be with, especially if he has a shaky history and is a liar.
this is true, he lies about everything to her, he’s slepted with me before and told me he’s had sex before me and then he lied to her and told her he is a virgin who is waiting till mirrage only bc she is waiting till marriage im glad im not with him…..and to top it all off she was telling me about her wedding and she said im not even a bridesmaid bc she has too many….first off im pissed bc i made those two and i introduced them and she choose thsi bitch girl taht no one likes of our friends to be a bridesmaid over me….im a lil pissed now im rethinking our friendship….

Oh, god, grow the fuck up and get the fuck over it.

Stop being so damn immature and petty…

Are you going to take your former best friend on a daytime talk show?
You didn’t make them a couple, they most likely conspired from day one to ditch you asap and the marriage is a sham just to make you hate them both.

Top what all off? You getting hurt over him and she most likely can see it and doesn’t want you in the wedding, smart call on her part. You are hollerin to the heavens over her taking your man, it takes 2 to tango.

You are only proving in this thread you can’t handle knowing them still, grow up, get a man (a different one) that is your’s first off from the start and do one of the one million things women do to keep men.

They have hoods in Iowa Matt?
We have "bad sides" of towns, and areas of low income housing…

I’m beginning to think we have a drama queen here.

beginning to think?

at first I thought she was just stupid and immature, and didn’t know any better. Now I think she knows better, but is trying to start drama from all this.

if the spotlight isn’t on her, then she’s upset. Good move on the ‘friend’ to not include her in the wedding, she’d probably try to upstage the bride

Related posts:

1. I think I am jealous of my friend I don't know why, but this guy steps in the biggest pile of shit you can imagine. He's 30, lives...
2. I lost a friend and I don’t really know why. So, I've been friends with this girl for 4 1/2 years. We never really dated, just occasional "dates" but nothing...
3. I was able to see myself through the eyes of my best friend So, last week, my best friend gave me his computer to fix. Needless to say, he didn't delete a lot...
4. HELP! MY FRIEND IS TRIPPING OUT HARDCORE CUZ OF HIS GF basically his gf is his life and they been together for 2 years. hes 22 and shes 21 today she...
5. Am I friend-zoned OT? Ok.... so I've been contemplating asking out this girl that I have known since way back. Back to grade school....