Err…yeah. I havent been on a first date in 6 years and Ive been on two first dates in the last 9 years. Needless to say, Im a little frightened. Advice!?!?!
Be cool. In other words, try your very hardest just to relax and have fun with it. You might know within 10 mintes that you don’t want to see this girl again, but don’t let it stress you out. Just try to make the best of the date and work on your communication skills with her.

We have had about 4 IM conversations, multiple eMails and one phone call. Should be interesting. We are going here tonight:

I would say don’t trash your wife the whole time. I’m not assuming you would, be just incase.

Everytime I talk to someone recently divorced, that’s all they talk about.

Good luck

Is there a time frame? He certainly shouldn’t be home moping over it I say kudos to you Paulie for getting out there again

Oh, and Socrates is right….if she brings up your ex-wife than you are allowed to briefly talk about her (and not bash her). If she never brings her up than keep your mouth ZIPPED.
Just go out there be yourself have fun, don’t expect anything. And don’t expect to be perfect your first time back out there. If this is fail, then take the good from it and move on to the next prospect.

I always wondered about time frame. I an recently out of a LTR (over 6 years) and its awkward for me when a date asks (been on 2 recently). Both times I was very brief and definitely didn’t say anything negative. Honestly I just told the truth, that it was time to move on and no hard feelings and then steer the convo forward.

I definitely wouldn’t bring it up if she doesn’t ask. try to relax and if you don’t feel the vibe just use it as practice…it will be kinda awkward the first couple times.

Good luck.
How did you get that date… not online right? Because that’s what I’ve been trying for the past 3 weeks with no luck… damn I haven’t had a date in a 10 months… I’d kill for one now. lol
Don’t talk about your ex-wife, marriage, or divorce. Trust me, that’s a pretty big turn off on the first date..

I came in here to post this. Don’t bring up your marriage.
Relax and try to have a good time. Don’t go into it with any outrageous expectations.

Yeah 2 months is enough. Im not sitting home dwelling on her. Thanks for the support IWUWB.

Yes the soon to be exwife was brought up a few times but nothing in depth.

The date was amazing. She was smart, sexy, made me laugh and seemed like a very good person. She looked good in her pics and she looked even better IRL. I did get a text from her saying, "Thanks for tonight, I had so much fun. Cant wait until next time!"

Hopefully something comes from it and she was not just shining me on. I cant stop smiling. Best I have felt in at least 3-5 months.

Far far far far far from fail.

Yes through Yahoo personals. Same place I met my wife in 2002.

Ive met 6 women through Yahoo personals in 2 weeks and been on one date with a potential two more coming next week or the week after. The last one I have been talking to non stop but she is 4 hours North of here which is a pain.

It is hard because its a constant comparison to the ex but the girl tonight, wow, just wow.

Congrats on the great first date. Glad it went well for you.

I don’t know if she was shining you on or not, afterall I wasn’t there. However, regardless you had a great date so try to just focus on that and leave the rest till later. In fact, I wouldn’t even worry about it till much later. I often tell myself, "I don’t know so I need more data." I know…sounds silly but it’s true and it helps me.

Very good point and thank you for that. If anything I had a nice dinner, good conversation and it will send me into a good start of the week at work. What more can you ask for!

It was hard not texting or calling her today. I kept flashing back to Swingers.

: So how long do I wait to call?
: A day.
: Tomorrow.
: Tomorrow, then a day.
: Yeah.
: So two days?
: Yeah, I guess you could call it that, two days.
: Definitely, two days is like industry standard.
: You know I used to wait two days to call anybody, but now it’s like everyone in town waits two days. So I think three days is kind of money. What do you think?
: Yeah, but two’s enough not to look anxious.
: Yeah, two’s enough not to look anxious. But I think three days is kind of money. You know because you…
: Yeah, but you know what, mabey I’ll wait 3 weeks. How’s that? And tell her I was cleaning out my wallet and I just happened to run into her number.
: Then ask her where you met her.
: Yeah, I’ll ask her where I met her. I don’t remember. What does she look like? And then I’ll asked if we fucked. Is that… would that be… T, would that be the money?
: You know what. Ha ha ha Mike, laugh all you want but if you call too soon you might scare off a nice baby who’s ready to party.
: Well how long are you guys gonna wait to call your babies?
, : Six days.

LOL!! I figure Tuesday I will make contact. 2 days is enough not to seem overly interested. I have thought of her all day though.
I wouldn’t even make mention of the ex wife period. If appropriate, mention you are recently divorced and move on to the next topic. IN my opinion talking about ex’s, good or bad, on a first date (or even while the relationship is still relatively new) is a quick way to kill something with great potential. My sister’s 1st husband died in 1998, and then she started dating again in 2000-2001…all she ‘d about was what a terrible asshole he was and blah blah blah blah blah…needless to say she drove away several good prospects.

Sweet! Hope it goes well for you.

Oh and on a side note, Heath Ledger’s Joker looks fucking unhinged! I can’t wait to see that movie.

I have the biggest fucking hard on for this movie. The last time I was this excited was last summer and that was for Transformers but that was a dud. Prior to that I cannot remember the last time I so looked forward to a movie.

Have you seen Iron Man? It’s fucking PIMP! Especially in a theater with an awesome sound system. I never knew how cool Iron Man was….now I’m a big fan. Oh and Samuel L. Jackson will be in the sequel!!!! FUCK YEAH!! I can’t wait!!

No I have not, I dont like going to movies alone and have not had anyone to go with. I think Im going to check it out this weekend though. I did not know they had a sequel already in the works.

July 18th, boo yaa!

Well don’t leave till after ALL the credits are finished and you’ll understand.
Sounds like you guys are hitting it off irl, that’s great. And she’s into Iron Man, or are you going to see it with some other friends?

Then again, I can’t talk about movie taste. I got together with one guy after he took me to see the Scooby Doo movie! It was great – he took me to something that made me laugh and it did the trick.

No I will probably go alone. Im trying not to do like a million things or contact her a million times in a week. Dont want to pull a Mike from Swingers.

WOOT! Congrats!!

The link to the restaurant looked amazing. So what’s on the agenda for round two?

Trying to figure that out today…
paulie, very encouraging for me to hear how well your date went. im tired of sitting around starting at the wall of the apartment my wife moved out of… but im also scared to get out there and get moving again. i never had trouble getting women before, but i also went 9 years before my wife without falling in love (deliberate). so right now, im scared that if i go out with someone, conversation will keep going right back to wife, wife, wife.

even if its to the tune of "omg you are so much nicer, sweeter, prettier, than my wife…" id still rather avoid that as well.

*sigh* oh well time will tell. there is this really hot girl at my office who always gives me the biggest smiles (different company, same building), who before i would never think of flirting with due to my devotion to my marriage, but now that im available, im sure ill fuck this up (and this chick would be a sure winner, if i could just play it cool).

when i look in the mirror, i dont see the guy who had no trouble at all with women before i got married.

Dont have time to respond to this right now but I will tonight around 9pm central time. (PLACE MARKER)

try to date moar than one broad this time

what he said

There is a time and place for everything and first date is not the time for that conversation.
That is like a fourth date conversation. Maybe even later.

You run the risk of appearing hung up on your ex.

Dating 4 right now…all I can handle.
I just went on a "date" today.
It was pretty good!

Im glad to see we’re both on the path to greener grass!
6th date on Sunday and she asked if she could spend the night….things are going well! Just thought Id give an update.

I did make a mistake last Friday and bring home a random and nailed the shit out of her. Cost me a little bit of self respect and it was rather rough so we ruined a $400 down comforter.
Eh. Fear not. Its nothing that a $40 duvet can’t cover right up

Way to go on the hot dates btw!! Seems like things are lookin’ up
Motherfucking winner!!!! Congrats on shit going good for you!
And to think a few months ago you thought life sucked
The TS is such a liar its great, he has a wife. BTW how is the Evo, 8′s yet?

They aren’t together anymore…..hence why he is dating again.
I’ve seen him with the same women for over a year pics with said woman might follow if I can get them. He has pics from the woman last halloween and just a few days ago.

new years

few days ago, can’t find the halloween ones

if you look closely you can see the ring on her finger

that’s not him.

:woot:

dot

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