Troubling point in life. 22
I’m not working, slowly running out of money, my girlfriend feels that it’s not good either obviously. It’s really slow in the winter to be working at a nail salon. I can’t sleep, I play too much pokemon/dota(I’m Asian) because life is losing it’s excitement, she seems to be on edge and attacking me late(I’m trying not to be a dick back), I feel like I’m lacking real friends or ones that I could rely on, they all have problems of being too lonely or drunk, none of them are worrying about progress, I don’t want to die poor or working my ass off doing a shitty labor job, I don’t see anyone fit enough for me to lean on right now. I feel stagnant, uneducated, stupid, like a loser. I don’t know what to do, school is expensive, I can’t trust myself with having a debt over my head, I want to leave everyone behind and start over or take some time off and head to Seattle with work with my friend under his dad’s company. I’m 22, I feel unaccomplished, I live at home, I don’t know what to do, how to move forward, trying not to hurt people if I leave. Also my doctor says nothing is wrong with me but I can’t sit, walk, run, too long without having a problem with stomach. I feel unbecoming/juvenile. I know it’s a lot but I just wish there was a clear path.
I can relate, here’s some input:
Ok, one thing I can’t relate about is having my gf on my case about my problems. She’s actually very supportive. But it kind of makes me think of that movie I Love You Man. If you’re home all the time, it might be driving her nuts. I sit at home a lot too out of boredom, but I do try to setup regular meals with friends, work on side projects (home theater stuff), and play on the computer to keep my options open. You’re into pokemon, why not try to build a home theater PC (HTPC) setup and collect the anime version? Just throwing ideas out that would spark my interest.
You’re not a bad person for avoiding the drunk friends, that’s a whole other hole to fall into. And I know it’s hard to make friends outside of work or school, unless you’re a very select kind of person. Where’s the nail salon? Can you walk to nearby places on your lunch and chat? Do your existing friends have any decent friends who stop by? I’ve made some decent friends via other friends. Stalk Facebook and find old friends? Might be hit or miss, but worth a shot.
What’s your friend’s dad’s company do? Can you look for a similar job where you are now? Can you get your gf to move to Seattle? Might be worth considering if you’re in that much of a slump. I’d skip school – but I’m not a big fan of it in general. I went back for a semester and it cost me like $8k…it’s one of the few real regrets I have. I don’t mean to sound harsh, but don’t use it as a cop-out. If you don’t have a true need to go there (i.e. always wanted to be a nurse), it’ll just burn up money.
What else are you good at? Ask your parents or an old friend if you need to. Might give you a little direction even for a job that pays a little more, and the happiness you gain from it might get you back on your feet. I’ve thought about taking another dreaded call center job in another area if I had to, because it works with a single product I feel extremely passionate about, and would get me on my feet. It’s a stepping stone.
I really think Seattle and your friend there could make a suitable option. If you can’t do it now, make a plan for the next year or so, it’ll keep you motivated.
in life, sometimes you are ahead, and sometimes you are behind. the race is long and its only against you self.
you know you want to get out of your current situation…so now focusing one day at a time at making that happen. cut back on that computer shit, i used to game too, now much less and life is fine. perhaps check out a community college? community colleges for 2 years —–> 4 year institution is hands down the best option. or you can get an associates in something that interests you and go from there. community college is relatively cheap compared to that 4 year scam.
we all have those drunks friends like that and yeah don’t fall into that pit. if your gf is supportive, she may bitch about the games, but if she does care about you, she can be a great support for your new journey.
something that took me a few years to learn is, you are going to have to put yourself outside your comfort zone and make new friends. you can’t hang on to your old buddies(some of them you will always be friends with) but you are going to have make new friendships with people that can bring value to your life or that you like.
you are 22. living at home isn’t unique. A LOT of people at 22 still have minimal direction, live at home, and are clueless about what they want to do. that is life.
as for your stomach problems, i’d recommend psyllium husk. its a plant that absorbs water and gentle cleans out your intestines. it can obviously be an issue with lack of lactose/wheat enzymes. also, stay away from sugar alcohols, xlyitol, aspartame, etc. those are horrible for your stomach. read up more online about your symptoms, watch what you eat, and you should be able to minimize your problems.
good luck man
I know that feel right now bro. Same age and everything. Start up school. Go to community college. That’s what I did and I don’t know where I’d be right now without it.